• Morgan Hart

What’s Your Emotional Lie: Burn Bootcamp Instructor Tells All – With Brett Timpano

Ok…so spoiler alert. Today’s episode is with a total Mama’s Boy. And I don’t mean that like a juvenile stab on the playgrounds weak link…

No no, today you are going to get a man who advocates for the full essence of girl power…and it started with his mom!

And if you are on the rally against girl power thing and fighting for all things equal…don’t worry – He’s got you there too! He’s all about encouragement, relationship, wholeness, guidance, and a good high five.

Personal Trainer and Nutrition Coach, Brett Timpano isn’t concerned with what you can’t do…instead he wants to know what you CAN do and will utilize that as the starting point for growth, strength and ultimately healing towards the best version of yourself.

We all have emotional lies…

From a young age, most of what you hear are the things you CAN’T do…is that why we inhibit ourselves as adults? Is that how the limiting beliefs begin?

I can’t do this or I can’t do that.

I’m sure that after today’s episode, you’ll gather grace for your ability to be the change within your own mind so that you can truly change the world…and that’s not a light hearted girly job…we need trend setters promoting the CAN DO attitude and ridding ourselves of the emotional lies that we can’t.

Brett Timpano Personal Trainer

Connect with him here:



Show Notes: What is Your Emotional Lie?

Tamra: Alright, I’m coming out hot with a total spoiler alert today’s episode is with a total mama’s boy and I don’t mean that like a juvenile stab on the playground weekly sort of thing. No, today you are going to get a good man who advocates for the full essence of girl power and it started with his mom. And if you are on the rally against girl power thing and fighting for all things equal, don’t worry, he’s got you there too. He’s all about encouragement, relationship, wholeness, guidance, and a good high five. Personal trainer and nutrition coach Brett Timpano isn’t concerned with what you can’t do instead, he wants to know what you can do and will utilize that as the starting point for growth strength, and ultimately healing towards the best version of yourself.

From a young age, most of what you hear are the things you can’t do is why we inhibit ourselves as adults? Is that how limiting beliefs begin? I can’t do this, or I can’t do that. I’m sure that after today’s episode, you’ll gather grace for your ability to be the change within your own mind so that you can truly change the world and that’s not a lighthearted girly job. We need trendsetters promoting the can-do attitude and ridding ourselves of the emotional lies that we can’t.

We are all in pursuit of something more, wherever, whatever, or whoever you’re more is. I want to help you get there wholly, fully, authentically, and truly. The fit in faith movement was birthed through my own trial and error discovery of mind, body, and soul alignment. I learned firsthand that being fit. Isn’t about our physique at all. It’s about the wholeness of our heart and the root of our joy. This isn’t a fitness podcast, this isn’t a quick fix health detox ploy, this isn’t confusing religious banter, this is a whole-body health checkup focusing on the heart. This is an opportunity to join me alongside other big dreamers, innovative movers, and lifestyle shapers as we explore and share our messy comeback stories to homes. If you’re one step away from achieving your idea of something more tune in for practical, fun, and healthy ways to ignite yourself into even more.

Welcome to the fit faith podcast, me Tamra Andress, there is no better time than now to get fit. We’re so pumped to be here. This is going to be a fun episode around everything, mind, body, and soul. I’m excited to introduce you to my friend, Brett, who is also my personal trainer. So you guys had an opportunity episode 12, I believe it was to hear from Haley who was my old trainer who has now moved on to bigger and better places, not really, she’s just in a different area, but Brett’s here and has taken her spot in a huge way. Big shoes to fill and I’ve been so grateful since you’ve come in. I remember the very first 5:00 AM morning and I’m like, Oh, he’s louder than Hayley at 5:00 AM.

Brett: I try to come with a lot of energy.

Tamra: You did. You absolutely did.

Brett: I might have had a lot of caffeine too.

Tamra: Just to like, come with… Did you have to pack a punch? Because you’re walking into a group of women.

Brett: Yeah.

Tamra: And so, I would love to explore that conversation in and of itself. But yeah, so honestly, I don’t know a lot about Brett, other than that, he’s hardcore, he knows what he’s doing in the gym and he’s also has a big soft soul. And I experienced that the first day too because when we were stretching afterward, you dove so deep so quick. And I don’t know if other people were like prepared for it or if they even take it to heart in the same way but when I go to the gym, it’s a spiritual experience for me, just as much as it is physical and mental. So, I appreciate that about you and I’m excited to see where this conversation goes.

Brett: I appreciate you for having me on thank you very much.

Tamra: Yeah, my pleasure. So, yeah. So, tell me first, why Burn? And it’s like a girl’s gym, right?

Brett: Yeah.

Tamra: So, like how did you come into that?

Brett: So, I guess my experience with… I’m from Richmond, Virginia, and I’ve been in Richmond for the majority of my life, probably close to about 30 years. And I used to work for basically a group fitness place, very similar to One Life called American Family Fitness. And it was a really, really cool place, a really great atmosphere, but I was kind of like at a crossroads because there was only so much more that I could do. And I was really, really passionate about helping people and I had become a personal trainer, I was still the group fitness coordinator. And when Burn kind of came along, I kind of saw maybe an opportunity and an avenue to really kind of take things in the direction that I wanted to go to. We’re constantly talking about how fitness is evolving and in fitness is going in different places.

And with my experience in my background, I really wanted to kind of explore my own freedom and how I train my clients and how I delivered fitness as a product to my clients. Sometimes I feel, especially with the rise in cross-fit and the rise and all these quick effective, but challenging workouts all we’re doing is we’re beating up the body, we’re beating up the body. So, what can I do to make fitness fun? What can I do to make fitness involving? I think Debbie Klein came up with a colossal idea that really tied in not just functional fitness in 45 minutes, so it’s quick, but he also tied into the fact that moms in particular sometimes can’t make time for themselves. And I don’t mean to downplay anyone else’s role in the family, but typically what I find is moms can be kind of the center of the family spiritually, emotionally, and more importantly, just culturally.

So, kids learn via osmosis from us, we pass on their traits to them. So when we can make ourselves a priority and really kind of make our health, our mental health or emotional health or our spiritual health or our physical health being primaries to what we do at Burn, when we can make that a priority that people tend to gravitate towards that people learn from that. So, when I left American Family Fitness, it was more about what could I do to help people all around. Really, I got into fitness because of my mom. I watched my mom in particular… this was kind of what I was drawn to Burn about. I was a soccer player and my brother was a soccer player, my sister did [inaudible 06:29] and we constantly had a busy, busy schedule. And I watched a little bit of my mom just kind of sacrificed her health and the things that she wanted to do, the things that she was working to do, I watched her sacrifice that, and I watched your health kind of go down a little bit.

Tamra: Wow.

Brett: So, in a way, me going to Burn was also kind of me giving back and saying, thank you for all these things that we’ve accomplished over the years. Thank you, mom. And she was actually my first client.

Tamra: That’s so cool.

Brett: And she’s actually right now in… she still lives in Richmond with my dad and my brother and sister. And they are actually at Burn Boot Camp Chester with coach Eric.

Tamra: Nice, okay cool.

Brett: And they’re great, Eric’s a great trainer, so I could not be happier for them.

Tamra: That’s really cool. What a cool testament. People always like, what’s your why? And to have that as a part of your why, and I know it’s probably more, it goes into your own experience as well, but to have that as your first example of osmosis, that concept of, okay, this is what I see and where she’s going with it and now I want to make a change for the better, and also allow her the opportunity to make a change, especially with her as your first client. Mom, let’s do this. It’s time for you, I want to give back to you.

Brett: And I want to say really quick that she has lost 70 pounds.

Tamra: What?

Brett: And she is doing amazing. So, shout out to you, Kel Timpano are you doing awesome out there?

Tamra: That is amazing, that’s so cool. Is she on the Burn Wall?

Brett: She is not on the Burn Wall yet…

Tamra: She should be.

Brett: And I hope that she gets on the Burn Wall because she’s done an amazing job.

Tamra: That’s so awesome.

Brett: But Chester just open, they’ve been open for almost three months now. So, I’m very hopeful that she’s going to do her transformation story for Chester coming up here pretty soon.

Tamra: That’s really amazing, and how old is she? Well, we’re going to ask because I’d love to know.

Brett: Oh, you are putting me on the spot right now.

Tamra: It’s okay, she’s in her fifties or sixties?

Brett: Sixties. Low sixties.

Tamra: She’s barely 60 and I just think that that’s really rad, like…

Brett: She doesn’t look any older than 49.

Tamra: Of course not. I would not expect anything else. You’ve got a baby face to face so it’s got to come from somewhere.

Brett: 62, 63.

Tamra: Okay, oh you just like, shoot. I’m sorry, mom. We love you.

Brett: I love you mom, sorry about this.

Tamra: I think that it’s awesome because a lot of my, why comes alongside my mom as well and living life with her and she was the same way. She gave up everything for us to pursue our experiences of wholeness and one of mine was gymnastics. And so that’s where my background comes from in fitness and the muscle memory really is the main thing that I’ve taken from it other than back pains and things like that all the ailments that come alongside the muscle memory, it’s amazing. And she did, she sacrificed that for us, but to know now and forever, I mean, she’s been a really good example of also health and wellness from what she fed us to her own exploration of marathons and half marathons. She’s always putting her health. She’s also a Burn sister, so that’s cool.

Brett: That’s awesome.

Tamra: I don’t know if you’ve had the chance to meet her, I don’t know how frequent she’s been coming. Mom, we’re shouting you too so…

Brett: We’d love to meet you.

Tamra: Brenda meet Brett, Brett meet Brenda. But yeah, she’s incredible and at the same time, she’s in her mid-fifties and so many of my listeners and so many of my friends are in that bracket and they struggle because they have done this and they’ve generally unlike my mom put it completely to the side. And so now their kids are out of the nest. They’re seeing they’re going through this transformation of hormones, which you don’t know about, but you know about enough because you talk to women all the time like I can’t lose it, I can’t do it. So how do you confront people around that of like the, I can’t mentality, and like shed light on getting past that? You did it with your mom so.

Brett: So, realistically I think we’ve kind of really prioritized fitness as being one of the bigger changes to our life that we need to make. But one of the things that I’ve really kind of noticed as I’ve become more of a nutrition coach and picked up some different nutrition certifications, that we really trend to skip a little bit on the nutrition side of things, we think that working out is the end-all, be all to how we’re going to see results. But I think one of the things that I kind of harp on a little bit is in the gym we train our bodies, but outside of the gym, that’s when we have to fuel our bodies. And I think what you’ve really noticed over the last gee, 30, 40 years, and you look at our grandparents, our grandparents ate a lot of foods, whole foods that came from the ground, came from the sea and there were less chemicals being put into all that stuff. And now you have several different flavors of Pepsi. You have different colors; potato chips and you’re loading…

Tamra: That’s so true.

Brett: You’re loading all these foods and, and changing them into food products and there has been a huge rise in a lot of diseases and a lot of illness. And there’s no one smoking gun, but I think if you could correlate everything back together, it’s going to go to nutrition. So, I think what people tend to overemphasize is the fitness side of things, we, we tend to emphasize being as active as you can, whether it’s with burn, whether it’s yoga, whether it’s out cycling, whether it’s just going for a walk. We have to make time for herself and we have to make ourselves a priority whether that’s 30 minutes a day, 45 minutes a day. But when people are kind of confronted with the, I can’t do it well, it’s what can you do?

And I don’t ever like to harp on price, I don’t like to ever say like, well, you have to value this more than this, but it comes down to, you know, what is your emotional, why? And what is the thing that’s really driving you? Because if you have a deep-seated want, a deep-seated desire to change, you will find the ability to change somewhere. And maybe it’s not that you go to zero to a hundred, maybe you’re not working out five days a week but could you work out one? Could you work out two or three and maybe you build from there.

Tamra: Absolutely.

Brett: I have a client right now and one of her accountability goals for Commit to Fitness coming up. We’d love to have you guys by the way,

Tamra: Yes, [crosstalk 12:29] awesome.

Brett: September 3rd. One of the biggest goals she has herself is just to make time for herself to be in the gym five days a week. And I said, starting off, is that really feasible? Is that realistic? Maybe we start off at three or four. Let’s see how we do with that. Because if you start out and you try to go five days a week, you got to listen to your body first and foremost, but you may find out that five days right now is not realistic. And you might feel really, really defeated by not being able to hit all five days. So, let’s start at three, let’s start at four and let’s build up that consistency, build up that efficiency, and let’s get to five down the road, but right now let’s listen to our body and let’s get there.

Tamra: That is such good wise information because so often we, and you know, it’s such a game of comparison in the, I can, I can’t situation. And especially when it comes to fitness and like, I can’t maintain that body type or I can’t maintain that nutrition cycle or I can’t maintain. So that’s why all of these like fast action opportunities are brought to the surface, it’s everywhere on everything marketing. And you’re like, okay, it’s not about, what’s going to get you to the bride dress, it’s not about what’s going to get you to the bikini it’s what’s going to get you the longevity of that health factor. And so, I really love what you’re saying about it’s not what you can’t do, it’s what can you do right now?

Brett: Well, I think people, for the most part, we have really come to understand that the time is a precious resource and we’re never going to get that time back. So, one of the things that we’re constantly exploring is how can I best utilize my time. And as companies and ideas and people of influence are growing, their ideas are going into quicker fixes things that will work for you. They’re guaranteed to work if you do this for a certain amount of time and that approach can work, but that approach may not be sustainable long term.

Tamra: Yea, exactly.

Brett: I do think like one of the big rises that we’ve had is the ketogenic diet intermittent fasting. I do think all that stuff works. I think paleo works, I think cross-fit works, but it’s being able to sustain that. Being able to be consistent with the practice and doing all these things. And it may not be the right choice for everyone, but we have people influence out there who maybe are doing this and they’re seeing results and they’re speaking about it and then everyone starts to think that I can do this. And maybe you can, but maybe it’s not the right opportunity for you, maybe it’s not the right choice for you and going forward.

Tamra: Totally. I have a funny story about intermittent fasting.

Brett: Okay.

Tamra: So, a couple of weeks ago I’m driving and my grandpa calls me, which is not very often. And when he does call, even when he writes, he’s a man of few words, they’re just like really strong, like, throws the hammer, he’s good with his words. So, he’s like, Tamra, I have a question for you. I’m like, yeah, what’s up Grandpa? Just turned 90, by the way, a couple of months ago.

Brett: Congratulations to him, happy birthday.

Tamra: Yeah, pretty amazing. And he says, so I think I’m going to try this intermittent fasting thing and I’m like trying so hard not to bust out laughing. I’m like, really? Like what inspired you to do that? And he’s like, well, you know, I have some heart issues, my body is not treating me very well and definitely need to lose some weight. And it seems to be working for you and other people. And I’m like, all right, grandpa. So, he’s like, so what is the trick? Because I am starving by 10:00 AM.

I’m like, okay, well, how much water are you drinking? He’s like, well, I don’t know, like, well, that’s probably your first problem because if you don’t know how much water you’re drinking, then you’re limiting yourself in the component of hydration, which is the first thing above all things is if you can start drinking water, you 99.9% of the time when you’re hungry, you’re not hungry or dehydrated. So, fuel yourself with water first.

Brett: Absolutely.

Tamra: So, I told him how much water and I thought he just dropped the phone. I’m like, grandpa, are you there? And he’s like, calculating, it’s like he was doing. He was like, I’m going to be peeing [inaudible 16:27].

Brett: Yea well, that is true.

Tamra: I’m like well that is true but you don’t leave your apartment so, I think it will be okay, I think that that’s an okay thing. And he’s like, Oh, all the curse words coming out, he was just like, all right, I’ll call you back in a couple of weeks and like hangs up the phone. I get a letter or an email a couple of weeks later and he’s like, yeah, my doctor said it wasn’t the best idea for a man of my age.

Brett: Probably not.

Tamra: And I’m like grandpa, you can choose ideas around it that will help you, but it’s not right for everyone.

Brett: That’s absolutely right.

Tamra: Please don’t kill yourself at 90 because you try some crazy quick fix to your health when you’ve been doing not too bad, you’ve made it to 90. We can do some things and make it better. You could totally drink more water, but I was dying I was like chuckling the whole time. Like my grandpa just called me for intermittent fasting results.

Brett: I love that. That’s the thing too, I mean, I love that aspect because not only because again, I hate to say this, but people, as we get older, we get very, very set in stone in terms of like what working for us, what’s not working for us. And to have someone, I guess that experience, it’s not… being accepting for new ideas is an awesome thing.

Tamra: That’s so true. I never thought of it from that perspective.

Brett: Being accepting of new ideas at age 90 is a really great thing.

Tamra: That’s awesome.

Brett: Maybe not the best thing, but it was a really great thing.

Tamra: And then likewise, like the literal counterpoint is my mom’s mom who didn’t set that example, she just turned 87, like two weeks later. And I’m at breakfast with her and I’m like, Nana, like, if you could do anything for your birthday, like, what would you do? And like right now she’s like, I would have dessert and it’s 9:00 AM. And I’m like, we’re well, gosh, darn it, you’re getting dessert.

Brett: Absolutely.

Tamra: It’s your 87th birthday. That woman would eat sweets, well, she does I think behind closed doors, she eats sweets all day long.

Brett: I believe that.

Tamra: And she would never give them up. So, there is definitely the mindset and she’s like, well, I made it this far, I don’t need to change my diet now you all don’t know what you’re talking about.

Brett: Well, any time that I went over to my grandparents, both sets of my grandparents we always had cookies made for us. Like as soon as we got in, there were cookies and we knew right to go for them. And then both my grandparents are were Italian so they made really good cookies.

Tamra: Oh, yum.

Brett: And we didn’t have just one or two, it was more like five or six. So, we were always spoiled a little bit.

Tamra: Sweet treats.

Brett: So, we had a great time whenever we would [inaudible 18:52] about grandpa.

Tamra: I mean, that’s what they are there for, I think, but my kids are very different when they walk into my parent’s house and they are health conscious. So, it’s hilarious that they go right for the cupboard and like, no fridge goes for the fridge.

Brett: Absolutely.

Tamra: That’s happening. And then my daughter opens the fridge and she sees noodles and she’s like, can I have the white pasta, like come on with the white pasta, you’re killing me.

Brett: There’s one thing that I don’t think that we’ll ever give up and we are Italian so we have big Italian meals. My mom can’t do this anymore, bless her soul, but anytime that we have family holidays, it’s always like pasta. It’s like rigatoni is like a big thing of a pound or two, so good. And my mom makes this delicious, delicious, delicious rim, hold on, it’s almost like a Pomodoro sauce, but it’s got, it’s got some like heat to it. So, and she seasons it with meat so like it’s delicious to die for.

Tamra: Nice, that’s awesome.

Brett: So, I mean, no matter how health-conscious, I can tend to be I’m just like, okay, we can, we can set this aside for a little bit.

Tamra: Yeah. And that’s the biggest thing is balance right?

Brett: Absolutely.

Tamra: And that in all points of our life. I intermittent fast five days a week, if want to go out to brunch I’m going to go out to brunch if I want to have breakfast one day because my kids want me to go to Dunkin Donuts, I’m going to splurge in I’m going to have a donut.

Brett: Absolutely.

Tamra: And it’s just a matter of being okay with it and not having that hard-fixed goal that you can’t deter from sometimes knowing that you’re going to stay consistent enough, that those five days going to the gym is okay, that you’re off. I’m I shoot for three or four, that’s my personal…

Brett: Yeah, I shoot for about four, maybe five sometimes. But I think that’s the thing that most people kind of miss is, rigid, disciplined can sometimes be a really great thing for people if they need it.

Tamra: Sure.

Brett: But you’re missing out on a lot of different experiences in life when you’re not being allowed to have certain things. You’re missing out on not just the different food experiences, but also cultural influences.

Tamra: Absolutely.

Brett: And that’s sometimes, one of the things, when I’m talking to clients, is, you can certainly do this and you, you can certainly cut this out, but I mean, how are you going to feel when you know, you’re out with your family and you can’t have this? So, is it going to work for you long term?

Tamra: Right.

Brett: We like to think maybe there’s an 80/20 rule, right?

Tamra: Yep, all about 80/20, yep.

Brett: Where we’re doing our very best to maybe work within our means or live within a certain idea for 80% of the time, but also allowing ourselves to maybe splurge 20% of the time. And I think we’re constantly like fighting this battle of trying to get within those means, and it’s not as close to 80 for a lot of us and that’s, I think sometimes the bigger struggle is understanding that…

Tamra: Totally.

Brett: It’s that give, and take that sacrifice and that reward kind of aspect.

Tamra: I love it. So, tell me from like a personal standpoint, you told me from like the drive from your mom, where’s that personal drive for you and being in a gym with predominantly women what does that look like in your own pursuit of fitness and health? Do you work out solely at Burn or do you…?

Brett: Oh no. So, I actually have a gym membership to One Life. I’m going to be a hundred percent honest I hate cardio. I have been a soccer player for most of my life and I’ve got terrible ankle issues lots of scar tissue, I’ve never broken a bone knock on wood, but I’ve had like lots of sprains and lots of strengths through my hamstrings, through my ankle. So, running for me is not particularly enjoyable, which by the way, I should point this out that my mom got me to sign up for a half marathon coming up in March.

Tamra: No.

Brett: So, we are going to walk that thing.

Tamra: Okay, okay. That’s awesome.

Brett: I’m not going to run it. We’re going to walk it very fast, so there’s that.

Tamra: I love it cool.

Brett: I’ve always really enjoyed weightlifting for me and actually coming to burn was a big, different way to lift weights, and you coming from a Group X background, like I really enjoy cycling, so like cycle bar is a really awesome thing, I have taught cycling before. I love yoga. The mind-body function for yoga is super important, it’s not something that we do enough of, I think sometimes. But like within my own goals, it’s not necessarily, I don’t have like a weight goal, I don’t have necessarily a body fat goal and I probably need to look at that for a little bit. But like my goal has always just been functional strength. I was in this mindset, I guess, growing up, I had to be bigger and stronger.

And I didn’t pay a whole lot of attention to form, I had no idea what it was doing in the gym. And I started really having some issues with my shoulder. I had some issues with my elbow, I had some issues with my knees, my ankle, and now for me, as I’ve really gotten over 30, it’s less about lifting heavy weights and more just about being functional.

Tamra: Yeah, absolutely. Can I move without pain? Can I still do the things that I want to do? Can I do them to a higher degree of efficiency? And that’s, that’s, I think where for me, it’s not necessarily, like, I’m not going wake up tomorrow and decide, Hey, I really want to go run three miles tomorrow, I might wake up and I’m like, I feel like doing deadlifts today, or I might, I feel like doing like arms and support tomorrow. So, I just kind of go where the wind takes me at this point.

Tamra: Yeah. That’s awesome. I mean, that allows that freedom component so much to know that there is not that rigidity in what you’re doing, but also…

Brett: Yeah, I’ve gone through programs before where I’ve had very set weights, set recovery time and this and that and honestly, it’s for me like I’ve gone through all that stuff and it’s just not enjoyable to me anymore. Being creative and kind of coming up with things on the fly and saying, you know, I’m feeling this today, we’re going to do this, that just works for me and that may not work for everybody. But for me kind of having that loose kind of interpretation of, okay, well, I am going to be active today, I am going to hit all my circles today, I got my Apple watch I got to hit all my circles…

Tamra: Yeah, I love it.

Brett: But going out and just being active and just kind of going with where I’m feeling that that’s the biggest thing for me.

Tamra: Yeah. It reminds me of something even speaking of the 80/20 thing. So, I have a 5/20 rule and so it’s the five buckets of 20%, which leads to a hundred percent of wholeness. So, mine are faith, family, food and fitness count for one of my 20, finances because that kind of drives a lot of things and fun. And so, I have this belief system that if you can touch all of those buckets on a given day, that you can go to sleep in your most restful zone of contentment. And it’s been a pursuit of recognition over the past couple weeks where people ask me so much, about how do you do all of those things? And I’m like, I don’t know. I’m just really passionate about the things that I pursue and I love them.

And it doesn’t feel like it’s detracting from anything it’s adding to, but also setting the example from like the finance point. Like some people are like, I have to work nine to five. I’m like, okay, well, if that is something that you have to do, do it with passion, find what it is that makes you so happy that you’re there, that it doesn’t feel like it’s, I’m only living from five o’clock to nine o’clock. And part of that, it was me waking up earlier and knowing if I want to pursue this fitness component, I don’t have time to do it in the evening. After my kids wake up that’s pretty much gone for me. And that’s where your example of mom’s like, it’s true. And it’s not because we don’t want those things, if anything, we want them, even more, when we don’t have access to them.

But it’s finding the grit to wake up early enough, not to know that it pours into me so much for the rest of my day. So, I would love and just encourage people to find like those five priorities in your life. Like, what are they that you really want to pursue? And it’s not going to be those and maybe it is because those are kind of like big umbrellas of what falls in that finances for me is like my hat when I wear at work that like I get paid, a lot of the other things that I do, I don’t get paid for, but I love them, they fill my bucket in such other ways that then I can overflow to my kids. I can overflow to my fitness. I can overflow to my kitchen because I have the freedom and time to put into my food, which my husband would laugh if he heard me say that, because really, he cooks for me, which I’m so grateful for.

Brett: What an awesome guy.

Tamra: If you’re looking for a tip to be and pursue a healthy marriage, cook for your wife, your mother of your children.

Brett: You know, it’s not a given these days that people know how to cook.

Tamra: Yeah, it’s true.

Brett: So, one of my, one of my teacher clients, and I’m still learning all the clients that we have because there’s a lot of personalities.

Tamra: Yes, oh my gosh.

Brett: And stepping into Haley’s shoes was a huge challenge. A huge challenge from a cultural standpoint because Haley is a great trainer and she’s a great person, a great leader.

Tamra: Totally.

Brett: But having to, you know, I have a different personality and I have a different experience with Burn. So, having to step in was one of the more challenging things that I’ve ever had to do, but really trying to better foster different relationships with clients has been a challenge because everyone is different. And how you approach people is obviously a little bit different. Like there folks that you think you can have fun with and folks that you think, you know, it’s a little bit more of a business standpoint and a little bit more of it’s a respect standpoint and you know, I’m not saying that I’ve, I’ve been a hundred percent successful with everybody, it’s a learning curve, it’s a learning experience, but one of my teachers she is a culinary teacher.

Tamra: Cool.

Brett: She teaches, I’m not going to say home-ec, but she teaches people essentially how to cook.

Tamra: That’s really nice.

Brett: Kids how to cook, like teenagers, and it’s not given these days that people know how to do anything in the kitchen.

Tamra: So true.

Brett: And that’s one of the things that I think is really kind of set us back as a generation and multiple generations. The fact that we don’t know how to cook and prepare our own food.

Tamra: That’s so good, that’s so true.

Brett: We don’t understand necessarily what food is giving us and how food is working for us, so we’re going out and we’re making whatever choice that markets to us that we desire. There’s that big chicken sandwich controversy right now.

Tamra: Oh yea.

Brett: And it’s like, it’s all the rage, right now, everybody wants to try it. And Oh, by the way, Popeye’s is sold out, I went there, I tried it.

Tamra: That’s awesome.

Brett: But I mean, it’s like one of those things right now, like, we know that like maybe like a fried chicken sandwich with butter and mayonnaise on it is probably not the best choice for us, but we’re so caught up in the moment of saying, hey, I’ve got to try this, that it’s just like, why do you want to try? Like, what is it getting you? How is this going to benefit your life? It’s a very short-term reward for us and we’re not understanding the long-term value of cooking for ourselves preparing meals and how food is helping shape our bodies.

Tamra: So good. We are at a friend’s school, and it’s one of the things that I like so passionate about and have helped cultivate that we have a garden, a huge amazing garden that our gardener has brought to fruition, but we also have a culinary space. And so, the kids are truly experiencing farm to table.

Brett: Yeah, It’s awesome.

Tamra: And composting their lunches and coming into the kitchen. And my kid’s preschool and kindergarten teacher, they go to the kitchen almost once a week and they’re cutting or they have that Montessori concept, so they’re using knives, they’re using glass…

Brett: That’s awesome.

Tamra: They are using all of those things and not to mention we do it at home because my husband’s in the kitchen all the time, but I have my kids constantly asking questions, is this healthy? And it probably sounds bananas to like the person sitting next to us, like, why is she making her children, why are they creating this such a healthy concept and that’s not what their brain is thinking? But for us, I’ve had to teach that, yes, the doughnut tastes good, yes, the cheeseburger, the hot dog, the french fries tastes good, but that doesn’t mean that they’re good for you and here’s why.

And so luckily, we’ve been so blessed in the fact that they’ve been able to maintain a healthy enough diet that when they do steer off course for a long period of time, their bellies upset. And they’re like, oh, I don’t feel good. I’m like, yeah, well, unfortunately, that’s like the signs of what you could have forever if you kept eating that way and your body gets so complacent with, this is what I have to eat, that it doesn’t know to starve for other things. So, it’s interesting. It’s a very hard thing to do from a child’s mindset, but as an adult, you know, you know,

Brett: Well, you know, but… so here’s kind of my problem a little bit with the fitness industry now, too. So now I feel like almost everybody has an Instagram account and everybody is a fitness coach, everybody’s a health coach. And there’s a lot of languages out there, there’s a lot of attitudes, a lot of voices out there that are saying that certain things are bad for you. And I think we have an understanding that certain things are probably better for you than others.

Tamra: Sure.

Brett: But you know, is there a problem with something like a white potato versus a sweet potato?

Tamra: Sure.

Brett: It’s still coming from the ground, it’s, still giving you some good nutrients and benefits. We probably understand that a white potato is probably not the best choice when it comes to energy, either short term or long term.

Tamra: Nutrient-rich versus…

Brett: Nutrient-rich, yeah. But we also probably understand in the scope of things that white potato is probably a better choice as of something opposed to like mac and cheese.

Tamra: Totally.

Brett: And that’s where like sometimes we are really… as different health coaches and fitness coaches and online personalities, we’re demonizing a lot. And it there’s, there’s some truth to some of what is being said, but there’s also a lot of grander with the language in terms of how things are being interpreted. And that’s where I think sometimes like you need to see someone speak to someone that kind of understands health in a more either holistic fashion or more professional fashion.

Tamra: Totally. I agree with that because even just the concept and, and you’re stimming the surface of it, but it’d be this whole, like rage around gluten-free, right? So like we consider ourselves, gluten-free again, 80/20, like if I’m going out and I want a burger and fries, I’m going for it. But there’s this whole stigma of why and who it works for versus who it doesn’t work for. And, they have the eat right for your body type or your blood type. And like that actually has so much premise and truth and people just don’t do the research, so they see the taglines of what’s working for 50% of people and they think they’re in that bracket. So, I do totally agree with you that you need to go and find and actually search out somebody who’s going to be able to give you an insight to you individually versus just a blanket, like, let me pull it off Pinterest and get this, this recipe or meal plan for the next month.

Brett: Well, someone asked me today, is dairy good or bad for you? Should I have dairy with everything that I’m doing? And I’m like, realistically, that’s a huge open-ended question. And I’m like, I’m not a registered dietician I can’t tell you what their dairies go to bad for you, but here’s what I know. There are probably some things that are better for you than others and everything in a balance is probably going to be a better source for you. But realistically, unless you are lactose intolerant, dairy might not be a bad choice for you.

Tamra: Yeah, again, I think everything in moderation, I was eating cheese, every meal, no doubt. I love cheese. I’ll put it on anything. Come on, sprinkle some on there, I’m good. And so, I decided like three months ago I was going to go dairy-free. I was doing it for skin purposes, not body purposes because I had already reached the body goals that I wanted. And I wanted to know what I was going to feel like if I was going to be able to do it. And now there are so many alternatives…

Brett: They really are.

Tamra: I have things that appear to be cheese. They look like cheese, but there are so many different variations of what it is. Like we had something last night, we had jalapeno stuffed nacho cheese, literally not your cheese, but nacho cheese and bean dip inside these jalapenos. And it was delicious where before we would put a big stick of cheddar cheese in there, it was also delicious, but it just totally different. So I’m thankful that at least there’s enough information out there and opportunity to choose what makes sense for you during those different seasons of life and to say, I’ll never have cheese again, no way I had cheese on a weekly basis, but I would say I went three weeks, no cheese at all. And I will say that it did help my skin and I did feel better. And so, I just think it’s different for everyone just like our personalities are different that you’re navigating

Brett: Well. And I feel like too, I really love the fact that like as a society, we’re actually trying to steer away from meat as much now.

Tamra: Yeah, so true.

Brett: Going like the, beyond the burger or Oh, excuse me, beyond meat and having some, some of these different options available because I had someone asked me is if soy was, was bad for them. And honestly, where that soy is formed there may not be anything wrong with soy. The Asian cultures have been using soy in their foods for thousands of years and they’re okay, but that’s the thing that may not be the right choice for you. But a lot of these legumes and soybeans and peas now kind of coming back. And it’s really starting to open up a lot of opportunities and avenues for people to try different foods and kind of incorporate what different aspects of health could be.

Tamra: Totally. I agree.

Brett: So, I really think like that is a great step in the right direction. Plus, a lot of that stuff is going to be a little bit more sustainable for our planet.

Tamra: Yeah, oh my gosh. 1000%

Brett: Which I think that sometimes we tie politics into this, but I mean, I think someone kind of came up with this diet that really looks at… let’s say the population explodes, we’re going keep going up, there’s going to be more and more people born and a certain point we’re not going to be able to feed everybody, so what is the alternative to that? Is it limiting or restricting everything? Or is it may be coming up with a new idea of what a diet could look like? What a diet that could be? And that’s where I think we’ve done a really great job with now trying to farm and source out some different options for people so that they can get protein so that they can get good carbs so they can get good fat with different things. You’re no longer limited to just certain products and certain items, there’s a whole mass of different ideas out there and they’re all great ideas.

Tamra: Absolutely. Which I think is so cool. I mean, and you’ve talked, you’ve literally hit on so many components of what your job is. So, you wear this… whether it’s your own title, however you go about doing that, I don’t really try not to believe in titles and don’t want that for people. But you have the mental component of this relationship experience and the mental of what are you bringing to the gym? What are you releasing in the gym? And then walking back out into your day to day life. Then you’ve got the physical component, but the physical component, isn’t just the fitness, it’s what they’re doing in the kitchen. And then where do you tie in the spiritual piece for you? Or even… I know, as I said, that first time we were stretching, I was like, man, you can be a pastor. I’m like, okay, alright.

Brett: I remember that conversation.

Tamra: I was impressed. And I went home and Morgan, who is my pastor and her husband. I was like, oh my gosh, you’re going to love Brett, he’s so great. And so, and we had heard all the things and so we weren’t sure what to experience. I’m like, I really like him

Brett: In terms of spiritual aspect I think one of the things that sometimes we were missing is just that sense of being. And I think when you talk spirituality, it’s, it’s not maybe just a singular faith, but it’s faith also in yourself too. We are people that have been blessed with this opportunity to live and experience life in the happiest, joyous way that we can and every opportunity and every choice that we make should steer us in that right direction. But sometimes we do need a little guidance, and that’s where I typically for me, I tend to keep my faith a little bit more private. I personally believe Jesus Christ, God, but really, I keep that in words because there are a lot of different cultures out there and a lot of different ideas out there.

And my ideas may not be right for them, but I believe that morality comes from somewhere else and we find ideas, we find spiritual ideas that help us sometimes bridge the gap to why we do things or why we believe certain things or why we, why we essentially…why we do certain things. I’m going to be honest, growing up, I was never very spiritual. And I think when you sometimes grow… my grandfather was part of the church, we still went to church, but I always kind of resented it a little bit. And I think as you grow older, you start to really question things. And when you don’t have answers, you really start to look inwards and you start to almost feel certain things and you start to believe and you start to have this passion again for why certain things are happening in the right way.

And I think as I’ve gotten older, I’ve become a little bit more spiritual because I’ve started to, to bridge the gap to what I’m thinking, how I’m feeling with, you know, why I do certain things and I tie it all back to… we grew up Catholic, So I tried a couple of churches around here, some of the modern churches, and I don’t know that I get into this, I kind of like the traditional type stuff, I think it, we’re looking for a message and we’re looking for a meeting and I think it’s, it’s that kind of stuff that gives us that spiritual kind of guidance, that spiritual kind of faith to fill a hole that sometimes we’re missing. So for me, like I try to attach myself to things that show meaning express meeting. And I hope that people, I don’t want to come across as like being to rebel rousing or anything, but I hope that people can draw their own connection in their life to something that means a little bit.

Tamra: No, and I think that like definitely is a huge like umbrella. And then when you speak, it was by no means like pinpointing any faith or and that’s a hard thing to do. So to have like your own personal thing, but then to offer it out there overall in a sense of just love and a sense of like gratitude and a sense of being like you guys showed up today and I hope that when you leave the doors that you show up for the rest of your day in whatever capacity that means. And so that motivational speaking, which has a bad rap sometimes, but it really is important for people. It’s important for us to be able to come to a place and have that release. And sometimes that’s all they got, you might be the only touchpoint for them to go a little deeper beyond their fitness and beyond their mental health and like, tap into that.

Interesting that he just said that. And so, I’ve found my own self, like reflecting on things that you’ve said. So, I know Burn sisters are probably going to be watching this for them to have that same experience with you. So I’m grateful that you brought that energy into the gym and all the other girls, all the trainers have their own sense of motivation and their own sense of spirituality that I really appreciate that it’s just been neat and I wasn’t sure how it was going to be like with a male influence. And my dad was… has always been my, my rock when it comes to fitness. He was like the original goal’s gym guy, the tanks that like basically you’re not wearing anything…

Brett: Oh yeah.

Tamra: Shorts, which he still wears to this day that he might as well also not be wearing Whitey tighties at that point, and like just ripped. I mean, he was a bodybuilder, like that was always his thing. And so, when you came in, I’m like, Oh man, this is so cool. It’s like my dad though we’re the same age. And I’m like, this is like to have him as my trainer again, to have those sense of qualities that I know one day is going to be amazing for your wife and children, to be that in a home for someone it’s just really cool. So, I’m grateful for you, for sure.

Brett: I appreciate that very much.

Tamra: I wanted to ask one more question around the hat of mental health and exploring all of these different personalities as you’re walking through the gym. I never thought of it from the perspective that you have to do all of that at one time, So just to high five, for example, when we start working out in the morning, the first thing that they do while we’re doing our warmup is the personal trainers go around and high five, every single person sometimes by name, which is always very impressive, especially at 5:00 AM. But when you make that point of contact to say, like, I see you, I see that you showed up. That’s amazing. But even like a simple high five for 20 different women can come off totally different.

Brett: It does.

Tamra: How in the world did you navigate that? Like an interpersonal experience? How’d you gauge that? How long did it take?

Brett: It’s constantly evolving because I think you can definitely… body language is something that I sometimes pretty keen on and you can kind of read people’s energy. And sometimes I struggle actually to really understand, like, is it me, or is she just having a bad day or is he having a bad day? Or is it just not their personality? What’s strange to me is that like, you know, we started with high fives and it was a very weird experience, but it makes a lot of sense because you’re connecting people, you’re connecting energy with people, you’re connecting thoughts, ideas.

But you’re also connecting just like you said, love more anything else. I see you, I respect you thank you for being here, but you know that sometimes that’s not what everyone he needs that sound everybody’s there for. And when people leave Burn and they go to a Group X class and they’re like, hey, yeah, I went for high fives and people looked at us strange.

It’s like, it comes across as being like, okay, what we do here is special, which is great, but it’s a constantly evolving thing because you and like, we might high five, we might really get it, I have folks that like, try to break my hand, they’re just excited to see me, which is cool. And I have folks that sometimes it’s just a little tap and they’re very quiet they’re to themselves. And I don’t know if I’d make them uncomfortable. I don’t know if they’re just here and that’s, that’s the best that they can do, I don’t know if this whole experience is just a little scary for them and maybe it’s not for them, but they’re trying. So that sometimes is a really big struggle for me. And I take it personally and I’m just like, is it me?

But to that aspect too, like, I can’t let it get me down because I’ve always kind of said that… I’ve also been told this too, that I’ve got kind of like the showman’s voice, like about the announcer’s voice, I tried out for I used to teach like Les Mills body, combat, body pump, and all that stuff too and I tried out to be a trainer. I went through some, some high-end courses and whatnot, and they were just like, you know, you kind of come across as an entertainer and it’s almost like a little fake. And, I really thought about that for a little bit and I just kind of realized that, you know, for me, like when I get in front of people, it’s a role that you play.

Tamra: Absolutely.

Brett: And sometimes like, no matter if you’re having a bad day and I have bad days, no matter if someone else is having a bad day and their energy is just kind of leaking over to you, or if something’s really going on in your life, you can’t let other people see that because they’re here and you’ve got to give them the very best experience that you can, you’ve got to hide everything, you’ve got to put that hat on and you got to get to work,

Tamra: Man, that’s tough. That’s a tough role to play.

Brett: It is.

Tamra: So I have come into like a new zone within the last three years of really being vulnerable enough to show up in that emotion because I feel like my whole twenties, and my whole life really, I was so good at putting on a smile and I was so good at like coming to the table strong. Like I got you, I got you, we’re going to do this. And meanwhile, breaking and having those moments of hurt and pain and not being able to share it eventually with anyone. And so, I totally respect that. I’m sure you have your inner circle, that those emotions are being able to be shared with that then you can come to space where that hat. But I have had a couple of experiences that I would challenge you with that have literally been life-altering where I’m a business coach in addition to the wellness concept.

But it’s a business opportunity that people come to the table and I help pursue their passions and purpose and give them a leg up on all things business. And initially, I had a really hard time, because I didn’t think that it needed to have any sort of faith component to it. I’m like any spiritual… like people do their own thing. And came to the table and I was just walking through some really dark times and came to the table and someone was just like, Tamra, you seem a little off and I just lost it. I like cried right at the table. I’m sitting at the head seat and I was like, you know what guys, like, I think this is my opportunity to be completely authentic with you that this is struggling. This business component is hurting. My personal life is struggling here.

And you guys always see me with a smile and yet I need you to know that it is hard work. And so, you showing up to the gym, even in that authenticity or that vulnerability and be like, guys, I’m a little out of sorts today. So, I apologize if I seem out of whack, but I’ve got some stuff going on. It’s important for us as the people you’re training to know that maybe you need an extra high five. Maybe you need that extra thought at the end of our workout. And it’s very different, it’s surely a different experience, but I would appreciate that because I know from walking through it that you’re not all smiles and entertainment every single day.

Brett: Yeah. I mean, I think life can ebb and flow high and low a lot. And I think, one of the things that I’ve always tried to be respectful of is people’s time. You’re making the effort to come here and improve your life, it’s not about me and how I’m feeling. It’s about how I can help you get to that place. But there is a lot to say about sharing and experiencing life together. And some people may not resonate with that, but there will be a lot of people that may respect you better for it and I think once we can sometimes connect with people on a more open and vulnerable level and make stronger connections, we can forge better relationships, not just with people, but with their families, with the community.

And I think one of the things that almost has happened over the last four years, eight years, the whole political system, we’ve really fragmented a lot. And I think people more, or are looking for differences these days in each other, instead of looking for commonalities and instead of looking to bond, we’re looking to divide. So, I think the more that we can connect and be vulnerable and understand that we may have differences but we’re all here together and we’re all here to improve our lives and do this and do that the better we’re going to end up being.

Tamra: Yeah, I totally agree. And to know, and you are, I think cognizant of this is that everybody who walks on that mat no matter what time of day, like we all have a life going on. And generally speaking, there are the highs that we could bring on the mat or there are the extreme lows. And I’ve surely worked out and been in tears trying to mask it while I’m trying to just put the weight together to get the next rep going. But it’s so important for that connectivity piece for us to be able to know and see like, Oh, wow, they’re just as real as me, oh, wow, they splurge yesterday.

And that was one thing I always loved about Haley and Krista is, they’re always just like, you know, Sunday is my cheat day, let’s go out, let’s get together, let’s go hang out. And that allows other people, the example to be like, oh wow, they had that day, they could experience it and yet they’re there Monday through Saturday paying for it the next week. So, it’s definitely a fine line to walk and I am like not envious of the fact that you have to thread on. All of, I never honestly thought of it from that perspective. Like all of the… you’re kind of like walking on stones all the time.

Brett: Well, you tiptoe around things certain times, but on the same point too you, sometimes you got stride, I think sometimes, my energy really is going to help set the camp. And I don’t know if you’ve traveled to other Burns, but I like to think that like every location, you’re going to have a great experience wherever you go, but we know that it’s not universally true. We know that we might connect differently with different trainers, I know that people have connected differently with Haley versus me, people connect with Krista over me. I think Kris is hilarious, by the way.

Tamra: Yes, she is.

Brett: People connect with Rachel. Rachel is very down to earth, I love Rachel, but people connect differently to trainers and sometimes like, that’s okay to connect differently with trainers, but have you ever been to like a Group X class or a Burn…. hopefully not a Burn Boot Camp experience, but like the energy was just dead and you felt like that workout just took forever and it wouldn’t end. And that’s the thing like as a trainer, as a coach, as a group exercise instructor, you have to lead with passion, you have to lead with energy. And that’s where for me, I have to, whenever I step on, I put that microphone in my hand, I got to give them the very best experience. I can’t mail this one in.

Tamra: Totally, totally. I very much appreciate that and especially to do it day after day and morning after morning,

Brett: Well, you touched on it. You know, you have to live with passion. You’re not here to just make money and buy things and die. You’re here to essentially change the world. You’re here to go out and help others, their passion, and reach their goals because this is a shared experience and what we do with passion, people take from that.

Tamra: Yeah, it’s so good. And I love that because sometimes I think I’m a little nutty when I’m having conversations with people that I have… I literally want this concept of impact, I want to change the world and people don’t always receive it, but everything each person is doing no matter what their job is, no matter what they’re putting their passion into and it’s not necessarily a job, maybe you don’t even get paid for it, you are a ripple effect for change positive or negative. And that’s up to us in order to choose what that positivity or negativity slant looks like. And so, let’s hope that it’s more people in the positive realm that it isn’t the negative…

Brett: Absolutely.

Tamra: But to change the world, I love… it’s such a big word, but it’s so true that every person has that capacity. You can do it. And so, wherever you are, I’m so pumped that you tuned in.

Brett: Thank you very much.

Tamra: Mind, body, and soul, so much goodness in everything that you do and bring to the table. And I’m grateful that I get to train underneath you.

Brett: I’m grateful to have you as a client.

Tamra: Yeah. Thank you. It’s been fun getting to know you today. And if you guys want to know more about Brett before we get off, I do want him to share about Commit to Fit because it’s my home gym. It’s where I have grown to love and find my best self in my body, both mentally and physically. And I’ve been there, I’m about to hit my two year Burn birthday.

Brett: Woot, woot. Burn-versary

Tamra: And I’m very pumped about that. So, tell about commit to fit and how they can jump on.

Brett: So, commit to fit is our six-week challenge starts on September 3rd, it’s $99. You’re going to get unlimited camps. We have complimentary childcare. We’re actually adding a camp time. So, we’re going to be at 10 to 11 camps every single day, Monday through Friday. Saturdays, we have seven o’clock, eight o’clock, nine o’clock. You’re going to work one-on-one, you’re going to work in groups with very, very positive people. You’re going to have focused meetings with trainers that know a lot about nutrition and they can help you either with maybe some recommended food choices or some behavior patterns.

You’re going to work in a state-of-the-art facility, where the floor is actually filled with like rubber blocks and it’s very, very light and springy and very, very easy on your joints. And you’re going to have this amazing opportunity to empower yourself, to really take back and make your health and your fitness a priority. So, we have a limited number of spots, I think we’re down to like under 30 at this point, we have signups going up through September 3rd, we’ve extended it out a little bit. And we would love it if you’re listening to this to have that opportunity to maybe change your life, maybe change your life for six weeks, maybe further. I mean, take a little courage and just go for it.

Tamra: That’s good. And there’s on the wall, it says, if it doesn’t challenge you, it won’t change you.

Brett: Absolutely.

Tamra: And it’s so true to know that your change in your own personal self can have the impact to change the world.

Brett: Absolutely.

Tamra: So, so good, again awesome. Join us for Commit to Fit. It’s a six-week program for 99, so for all the people going back to school, your kids are in a space that you now have the availability to jump in. We look forward to seeing you. I’m There at 5:00 AM so get your booties out of bed and come hang out.

Brett: You guys move, keep improving, keep burning. We’ll see you guys soon.

#fitness #mentalhealth #podcast

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