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  • Tamra Andress

It's Time to Take a 180 with Alejandra Crisafulli



The world is always saying, you can do it and you have this, but what if they are cheering you into a pace that might not be aligned with where God has you in this specific season?

We talked about shame around this idea of being so self-centered in the world, and my guest today, Alejandra Crisafulli, has a new presentation that was presented to her from God himself, really through her life. And it's this idea of, instead of just being on the rat wheel of the 360 story, what if we took a 180 and we actually did something drastically different, what would it look like? That directional shift and that solution could stop the insanity of doing the same things over and over, and expecting a different result.

With her four pillars you're going to be changed forever, and she only gives you a small part of it. Everything she does is done alongside the heart of the Father, and I love that she shares that transition too, and how God is using all of those things for good.

Enjoy!

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About Alejandra:

AN AWARDING WINNING MASTER COACH AND GLOBAL SPEAKER. With over 20 years of experience in coaching, training and development, Alejandra is considered one of the “pioneers” of the coaching industry. She has worked with thousands of coaching clients, trained over 300 coaches, guided entrepreneurs to scale into multi 6+ figure and 7+ figure businesses, and has built a multimillion dollar coffee business with her husband Eric spanning Southern California. Known for her engaging and compelling style, she has taken practical business expertise and married it to energetic spiritual science, giving her clients results without the BS.

Where to Find Alejandra:

https://www.instagram.com/theballercoach/

https://www.facebook.com/groups/ballercoachkingdom

Where to Find Tamra:

Let's Connect! Book a Call today to see how I can help you grow your business! https://calendly.com/fitinfaithmedia/activation-intro-call

Want to write a book, start a podcast, or create an ecourse? Visit us at https://www.fitinfaithmedia.com/

TEXT Me (yes, it's really me!) at 📱757-906-3734


Show Notes: It's Time to Take a 180

You know how the world is telling us to like, get back on, you can do it cheering you into a pace that might not be aligned with where God has you in this specific season. Well, if y'all know anything about my story and you want the details, you can get it in my book, always becoming sex, shame and love.


But we did talk about shame in this conversation, shame around this idea of everything being so self-centered so. Help self-instruction self . Right? Well, Alexandra, our guest today, she has something new for you. A new presentation that was presented to her from God himself, really in her life. And it's through this idea of, instead of just being on the rat wheel of the 360 story, this has been a theme.


It seems in the conversations we've been having on the show. She is infusing the idea of the 180 method. If we took a 180 and we actually did something drastically different, what would it look like? That directional shift, that solution stop the insanity. Insanity is doing the same things over and expecting a different result.


Well, with her four pillars and this. You're going to be changed forever more. And she only gives you a token. Angela gives you a little taste of the four pillars with one, but if you tune in, I know you're going to be transformed by this baller coach of pioneer in the personal health and personal development, honestly, in the realm of life coaching.


And now she's doing it alongside the heart of the father. And so I love that she shares that transition too, and how God is using all of those things for good, for her to have a 180 method and for us to do the same, y'all you're going to enjoy this one. Be sure to follow us both on social, get in touch with all of the things she has coming up.


Oh. And by the way, we have something really exciting for you. Stay tuned to the show notes so you can get in on what we've got going on to shared masterclass. You're not going to want to miss this collaboration.


Welcome to the fit and faith podcast. It is an acronym representing founders, innovators, and trailblazers who are looking to live a life wholly fully, authentically, and truly fit a space for us to connect on the raw real stories of mind, body, and soul alignment of entrepreneurs in kingdom leaders. I'm your host, Tamra and dress.


And this podcast, isn't like the cookie cutter interview experience. I've been coined the entrepreneurial rabbi. And so we do go there unscripted, no matter how far wide, deep or high there is. My desire is to see people rise from the inside, out, into their greatest calling, by sharing their truest stories.


And tips as a purpose activator and brand builder. I believe our successes and failures are derived from who and whose we are not what we do, but strategy and vision are equally as important to the mission. So let's cut to the chase together and get fit in faith.


Y'all were in the green room. Just like getting it with those. The speeds. It's so fresh. It's so,


oh my gosh. Alejandro. I'm so glad to hang out with you today. But the first time on a fit and faith podcast. And so I know this is going to be a good one for our community to just get the behind the scenes of what has been an evolving relationships since January and excited to do more together in the future.


So grateful to know you and to have befriended you this. Oh my goodness. Back at you, it has been such a pleasure getting to know you more. And I love that we got together and are able to share to agreed, agreed. And I hate it. I was so close to where you were and we didn't get to get coffee together. Like officially we need to get coffee y'all she runs a coffee business.


In fact, um, how many locations do you think. Six. Okay. I was going to say seven. So seven is prophetic then that's what I was saying in my head. I was like, she owns seven locations and I love coffee as specifically mushroom coffee. Do you guys have any mushroom coffee? We do not have the mushroom coffee.


Yeah. Yeah, there you go. Well, I love it. Nonetheless, my husband drinks coffee all day long. I'm off often wondering if he's dehydrated, so I'm like, babe, you need to drink something other than coffee, water. Lots of lions. Um, man, but it was, it was actually making me. Because if you guys were able to see the intro, Alexandra is referred to as the baller coach, and I know that that is a unique name.


I'm sure there's a whole backstory, but it brought me back to high school because one of my best friends in high school, uh, her name was MJ, Missy Jenkins and fact, and she was the point guard of the basketball team, but she was like super short and I always thought it was so cool. Friends with a baller.


And she would always just walk around calling herself the baller. And so in that moment I was like, oh man. So you brought back some good high school memories today, but I want to know why you are called the baller coach. Oh my goodness. So this name actually came from, I was getting ready to do a work.


And before it was just all a hundred Krista coaching, which is kind of a mouthful. And it's hard to spell too. Anyways, I was getting ready for a workshop and I had one of the gals who was helping me, beautiful woman, just great assistant. She was like, you're such a baller, all a hundred. Like you do all these things and you help all these people.


And you're just like this baller coach. And I was like, Ooh, that's kinda cool. That, but I want to like redefine what being a baller truly. Yes. It's not just about like money or whatever you might think of when you think of baller. It really means to. Two's to win the fight against fear, to speak through trust instead of false hood, um, to promote wisdom rather than confusion, and to focus on faith beyond obstacles.


And that is. Does, and I want the definition, so I can put that on the background of my computer. So there is a finale of your bio that I was like, Ooh, this is new. I haven't heard this. She says, known for her engaging and compelling style, which that. Prove that, but she's taken practical business expertise and married it to energetic spiritual science.


And this is the part giving her clients results without the BS. And I was like that alone results without the BS is baller, but I am loving the depth and the width of what it is that you just explained, because I don't think even though people are always wanting to associate to integrity that that's something that they actually searched for when they're looking for a coach, but they should.


Yeah, absolutely. I mean, It's definitely the foundation of what I stand firm in. Like I having been in the industry and I don't think we've shared this part yet, but I've been a coach for 19, almost 20 years. So I was a coach back when it wasn't even a thing. Like people, life coaching was right. Um, so I'm also referred to often as the pioneer in the coaching industry.


And so back then not knowing what that was, people really didn't get, like what, like how and what is that? Um, so I felt like really being integral and, and honest and authentic, which I know that word is, you know, spread out or set a lot. It's true. Like that is the foundation of having a great coach as someone who can truly walk the walk and talk the talk.


Um, and, and I find that that doesn't always happen with. Kind of, you know, challenging. Well, it's more and more challenging. The more and more people get into it, right? Like it's no different than podcasting. For instance, I feel like now that so many people are popping into this space more and more like, can you really trust with everyone with.


Says right. Can you trust that every coach actually knows what they're talking about or has some realm of influence that's worth listening to, or I'm worth applying to our business and whether it's a business or a life thing, anything that has to do with your life is life coaching. So I think business is life coaching, regardless of it's called better, not.


Um, but I'm curious because it wasn't something that. Popularized or normalized or even talked about how did you first get into it? Like what exposed you to. Oh, God. No, I just, um, I just didn't know it at the time. Cause I might, God recently was just about three years ago. So I think that's part of, you know, what I don't think I know that was part of my path and how he had me knowing both sides of the spectrum.


Self-improvement and the self-development industry without him and the self-development industry with him, it was huge. But back then, I, you know, I didn't know him. Um, it felt like it was just, I would've called it like. Yeah, like universal connections and things like that, you know, I didn't know what I was talking about.


I really didn't like, I would say things and now I'm like, what were you talking about? I love that. You're saying those right now though, because most people would not even like put foot in mouth insert shoe now. Right. And it's okay. It's this understanding? Uh, in the conversation around my book, but even this conversation, all the time of becoming fit in faith, it's, it's a journey.


It's a process, it's an evolution, right? Nobody has made it anywhere. Even if you're hiring the most expensive coach, they still got places to go and people to see and things to do. And so it's like, what are you in? What are you looking for from them? And are they capable of serving that? Um, but I love that you're, you're willing to say, I don't really even know what I was talking about, but I was still getting paid for it.


Yeah. I mean, that's part of that being real and integral. Like I'm not, you know, never going to hide or cover up, um, where I was or who I am today. And so, you know, I was. To one of my clients at the time I was doing business consulting at the time. And one of my clients was like, Hey, let's go check out this, um, retreat.


It's a business retreat. And, you know, she had an extra ticket. It was like, let's go. So I was thinking, great, I'll go check out the competition. This'll be fun. Uh, let me see what else is going on up there. So I went to this, what I thought was a business retreat and it was. But there was one class that they had and it was called life works.


And I was kinda like, well, what's that, that's interesting. And it was a breakout session. So I, I went in and sat in on the class and they were basically talking about, and we had said this to you. Are your business. And if you're not working your business, isn't going to be working. And at the time I was really in a place of like, okay, it's not so much business structure systems that these people are missing.


Like it's something else. And yes, of course we need those things. We need the strategy. We need the system, we need the structure, but. If you're getting in the way of that, what do you do? And so the timing of it again was just perfect. And this whole retreat, and I, I actually spoke to the speaker afterwards and was like, this is incredible.


And she's like, you're kind of incredible. Would you like to be a life coach? Oh my gosh. Invited me into being a life. And I'm like, what is. Uh, I have no idea what that is. And she's like, you know, we're not really quite sure either, but you've got an idea of what this is going to look like and be like, and that's why we're teaching this class.


And I think you would be perfect. And it was a moment of, wow. Okay. Like felt out of the blue. It wasn't, it was totally leading. Right. Totally. Yeah. So, um, I said, yes. Well, I'm interested in it sounds cool. And let me step into that. And so I did, and thank God I did. Wow. And so how long in, from like the business consulting into the life coaching w and where was like the revelation of God associated to the spirituality?


How did that evolve? Oh goodness. Okay. So the business coaching, I quickly shifted into the, to the life coaching. Once I started training with that company for life coaching, like I was in, like, I just felt like this was the answer I had been seeking for myself. Personally, I was in a lot of hardship at the time.


I was a single mother. I was in a relationship with my now husband, but it was very tumultuous. We weren't married at the time. Um, you know, he was just such an amazing man, but we just had a lot of struggles. And so, um, I was feeling like this life coaching thing is it like it worked in my life. Um, and so I quickly just shifted into focusing in on that.


So it was really about maybe a year or two that I had like gone from business to life. And then I've been in life ever since the life coach. I mean, that sounds funny. I've been in life. I've been living ever since. And, um, When I met God, actually let me stay before that, in my life coaching, it was very like metaphysically based, lots of energetic science, things like that.


Um, and it was profound with. But there always felt like there was something missing and I didn't really truly understand what spiritual growth was. I understood it as a concept. I understood it from a metaphysical place and like universal energy, but I didn't really get what it meant to spiritually grow.


And three years ago, Um, I got sick and I ended up in the hospital. And while I was at the hospital, I had a crazy panic attack. They thought it was having a heart attack. It was actually a panic attack, but here I was with like the EKG and the EKG machine attached to me. And. What is this? I'm a life coach.


I help people, like, why am I here? What is going on? And the embarrassment and the shame, like it was just everything just like came crashing on me. It felt like, and I got stuck in that panic attack and it left, led to crazy anxiety, like level 10 and beyond anxiety insomnia. Um, it was just like, God's wake up.


Call was for me very hard, but so very needed. I was definitely, like I said, like not in a good place of, of here I was teaching and coaching and sharing and it was working, but I wasn't founded in truth. And I know that he designed me for truth and he gave me this gift of coaching, but I needed to go through what I went through in order to meet him at the level that he had me go through.


And so in doing that three years ago, I just jumped into a path of like applying my work. Cause I hadn't been doing that. I had been guiding and teaching so many others. So that was that whole out of integrity piece. Um, this is probably more than what you were asking, but oh, it's awesome. I'm loving it.


Yeah. Um, and. Uh, healing like a true healing journey began. Um, and during my, the first part of my healing journey, I had a mentor who said to me, listen all a hundred, you do amazing things, and you do incredible work, but if you find God, you're going to be a happy. And then it's like, wow. Okay. So I truly do need to find God.


And who is that? And what does that mean? And what does that look like? And it led me on the path of getting to know Christ and you know, it just, I mean, it makes me want to cry. He's so incredible. And literally. Pulled me out of the darkness and into the light and like your mind, and here's what I need you to do.


And that is the work that I've been doing. And so the anxiety gone insomnia totally. Ha who I was before and who I am now is totally a 180, which is, you know what,


but before you do what I find so incredible, and I want people to, to hook their teeth into their claws into is the understanding that like, Usually it's a messy story. Usually there's some sort of element of it. It doesn't look pretty. Um, I was just thinking this morning, how pretty much in my quarter-life crisis, I was just like running so fast that I thought I was super Sonic.


I thought I was Superman and I could run through a brick wall. And lo and behold, I hit the brick wall and my whole life shattered apart. Right. And it's like, What just happened to me, what just happened to her from the outside, looking in, and that element of shame like that you spoke to, I feel wholeheartedly.


Um, and, and that, knowing that like, everything that I thought was picture perfect was actually crumbling from the inside out, but it wasn't until, uh, my physical body hit that wall that I was able to actually. Stop and realize there's, I cannot do anything more than what I'm capable of in this moment. And in this moment, all I'm capable of is doing is breathing.


And I had two little babies at the time, so it was hard to mother. It was hard to get food on the table. It was hard to make eye contact with other people. It was hard. It was so hard. And yet at the same time, I know that what God was having me do in that time was. Forget about self, right? I was so self-centered and thought that everything, even from a self development perspective, even from a business development perspective, I thought I had it figured out so young.


Right. I could stretch it. I was confident I was all of these things from the outside looking in. And it was that time, that season of just really unbecoming in order to be com, uh, that I I'll never take back. And I feel. That person's wisdom towards like, you might have it all together and you're great.


And you're wonderful and you're shining bright now, but just wait, wait till you have that moment, that encounter, I can't wait to see you change your life change before your eyes. Um, but it doesn't mean that it's a pretty evolution. Usually it isn't and that's okay. I think if it wasn't for the muck and the mire, we wouldn't have the empathy factor.


We wouldn't have the ability to sit here, both like makeup lists and just like, let's talk, right? Like let's just put it all on the table. Yes. We have successful careers. Yes. We have an ability to coach and teach you, but we came out of an ability. R a lack of ability, really lack of ability. We came out of a place and we just allow God in his ability to show up for us.


And so really what we teach both of us. And I want you to get into your 180 method. Next is like, I can give you a system. There can be a structure, there can be a checklist, but at the end of the day, none of that stuff really matters in comparison to who you're connected to. And that energy, you know, Searching that you did.


And also our energy teaching is still connected. And I think people need to understand that as well. It's just now, you know, without a shadow of a doubt who created it and not just that, it was just the supernatural element. Oh yeah. Well said exactly. I think one of the most beautiful attributes of any leader coach teacher is humility.


And being able to like come to the table with that humbleness, um, no matter how masterful. We are, I am. You are like, it doesn't matter. I always choose to come with that humbleness because I know who am I savior is. And that it's all in his power and grace, not my own. And I think that is such the key thing.


And you were kind of talking about this. With clients. I tend, I share with them immediately, like I reject the traditional self-help models, so we would not be doing like a bunch of mindset stuff and, you know, things that. Self-improvement self-development self empowerment. Self-sufficiency like, if listen to every single word, that's their self.


And it's like, we are not designed to be in just the self. And this is why self-help. Isn't it, please don't get me wrong. Like I'm not downplaying it. It's just, it, it works. But only to a certain degree. And for so long before, you're like cycling back around to exactly where you started. Well, I think it gets into the like eventually it's I can't do it in.


Yeah, right. Because we are not self-sustaining exactly. It just doesn't work that way. It'd be like if we buy only ourself decided we were going to plant this seed. And by our ability alone, this seed was going to turn into a fruitful life. Right? Well, without the water, without the soil, with all out, all these other elements and the sun that decides to rise and fall every single day, like you would not be able to create something out of.


Even a baby, like in our self-empowerment as women, like I did this. Right.


Like cool. But no, you don't make that baby. And so I just, I love this so much about you and I love that we connected in this way, like out the gate, we both did. I could hear the deeper. Right. And I think people, especially if we're welcomed into an environment, that's not necessarily like, Hey, we're going to talk about Jesus here.


Right? It's not like that church type thing it is that self-improvement personal development. We'll call it instead of self, but personal development. I'm I'm more okay with personal development because there's a personal relationship and in transaction and intimacy factor that has to happen when you're in a relationship with God, unlike religion, that is very self, right?


It is. There's a huge difference in that. And so being in a space where it's not just. Oh, you love Jesus. I love Jesus, but like hearing someone talk and being like, oh yeah, they know Jesus, like let's connect. That's something that I really love about you. Yes. Thank you. And, and I think that's definitely one of my gifts is being able to connect with people in that way.


Um, that opens up the conversation more so, so that that development can happen. Personally and in the relationship with God. Yeah. So let's talk about that 180 method and knowing that you kind of did this on your own, so it's trial by fire. It actually works. Yeah, exactly. It sure does. So the 180 method, um, really comes from this fundamental place.


We tend as human beings. We tend to approach things in, in the same way in hopes that they're going to change, but those things will change some way, but we're approaching them in the same way. And what do we call that insanity? Right. Doing the same thing again and again, and expecting a different result.


But it's natural as human being to like approach things in that way. And there's a lot of. You know, in the self-help industry where there's three sixties happening, there's even leadership that talks about the 360. And the challenge with the 360 is that you end up in the same place that just started.


And for me, I'm always like, I don't know about you all, but I don't want to have to do a whole bunch of work and then end up in the same place that I started, let's say. Right. Like it just does not make sense. So the 180 method is that directional shift. It is the solution to insanity, but here's the beautiful part about it.


It's the natural. Response or effect that happens. So doing a 180 naturally versus a forced kind of way. And that's the part that's so key about what this method is and how it is a solution driven process, because it becomes natural for us just like right now. I know everyone watching and listening is doing a 360 somewhere in their life and ending up in the same place.


And you think you might be doing something different or you're trying to do something different, but really at the end of the day, you're going to end up in the same place. And that's because it's more natural to do that than it is to do something different. And so this 180 method allows for that natural aspect of how we are designed to take over.


So that it can be natural to do the new thing that you're looking for. Hmm. It makes me think of like, when I did a lot of therapy work on myself, y'all I was not the therapist, by the way I was in therapy. Let me rephrase that. And they were talking about like the cycles, right. And how we all are naturally in this cyclical experience, which is why generational bondage can occur.


It's why generational cycles transpired. Why am I sounding and acting like my mother? Why is this transpiring to be just like the thing I tried so hard to get out of when I was younger, I ran away from that lifestyle. So I could start a new, and yet here you are in that same space. And it's because there has to be that extraction that like leaps you off of the cycle.


And a lot of times people don't think that that's possible because it's not example, then it's not really. Right. At least from what I have experienced it as. And so even when I was in therapy and I'm like, okay, great. I see what you're saying. I see and recognize that this is transpiring, but how, how, how do I leap off of this cycle?


How do I get out of here? Right. And I think if you think of the rat wheel and the rat waste, and I talk about this all the time, because I. First I was first launched my company. I talked about how I quit the American dream, and I think the American dream is a wheel. I think it's a cycle and I think we're seeing more systems and more machines get in the way of our ability to think uniquely, to identify separately.


To actually be creative in our thought patterns and the way that we show up to life. And that's because it's inhibiting God from showing up, even though God is all powerful. If we're in position to just be in a cycle, that's like the enemy's territory. They're like, I'm good. If I can keep this person starting in 360, they'll stay dizzy.


I don't even have to distract them. And so we're living in a culture of dizzy people. Uh, yes. So, so true. And it's exhausting and it's so much to manage. Um, and I think that's another reason why the world is where it's at right now. Like everyone's just exhausted and we're just all over the place and it's the perfect breeding ground for the enemy to get in.


Yeah. So talk to us about, like, how do you, how do you suggest there's that catapult from this 360 feeding ground of the enemy to having a life of freedom and trying something new and doing something different? Okay. The God, that's a really broad, it is. It's a massive question. And the answer could be anything.


Yeah. Well, and, and there is some specific things that I could share around it too, but there's so much that goes into this 180 method. Um, so I want to be able to give like a tangible, hold it begin that whole process. I think there's some key aspects. Number one. Coming to the truth and acknowledging of what is going on.


I feel like acknowledgement is such a, it has such a super power and we often overstep or overlook acknowledgement, um, because we're so busy defending ourselves. That's so good. So true. Yeah. So first and foremost, to be able to like, literally stop. In your day to day and being able to acknowledge what's going on.


Like, even if you don't know exactly what's going on and you're listening to this conversation and your. Wow. I'm totally three 16. And you don't quite know like, well what's, what is the 360 exactly. That I'm doing? You just know that you're doing it based on this conversation. Fabulous. That in itself is a form of acknowledgement and to be able to like verbalize it and give it a.


It's almost like a virus. K. Think of it like this. This is high topic nowadays. Sorry to bring it up like this, but it's no, no, it's perfect. A virus in the body thrives and grows outside of the body. It dies. It needs a host to like live off of. Right. But outside of the host, it dies off. So if you think of it like that acknowledgement is something expressed.


And when it's expressed, it's out of you, it's out of the body and it does not hold the power. So good. I mean, I don't even want you to go any further because that alone is so powerful and the word that I was going to use as I was thinking of being in that hot seat and was recognition. Right. And when I recognized, okay, I see what you're saying now, what that acknowledgement factor did it freed me up it, oh, it was like scales being removed from my eyes of, of realizing.


Oh, my gosh. It's not just me though. Right? I recognize myself in that situation. And I simultaneously recognize the world through the eyes of empathy to say, this is not just me, but I can't fix them. And I do have a responsibility to fix me because I have a husband and I've got kids and they need me. And so it was putting in the hard work.


Not just the first acknowledgement, but the acknowledgement every step thereafter on where it was, I would say my second without knowing what the 180 method fully is, what. And maybe it's not second. Maybe it was like third, but it was like acknowledgement. And then for me it was surrender and it was that fact of like raising the white flag and then from surrender and being okay with being a mess and not being perfect and not having all the answers and not being the one that everyone needed to come to, to fix their issues.


Especially when it came to familial issues, I then was able to ask for. From the right people. Right. So that, that would be mine, but I'm sure there's so much more layers to that. Yeah. And I mean, those are like beautiful first steps, like yeah. Acknowledged, surrender. Ask for help. Like there you go and ask help for help to the right people.


That's the key thing.


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Yeah. I mean the 180 method has, has four pillars and one of the first, the first pillar is actually what I call the golden key. And it has to do with knowing how you are actually creating your circumstances and your relationships. Because, what I find is that most people know that they do create their circumstances, but they don't know how they're actually doing that.


And that's that how part that we're talking about. So right from the get-go is being able to learn how you're actually in this place of creating circumstances and relationships in your life, because everything is a circumstance and everything is a relationship. So when you know that, how. That's when like beautiful things start to emerge and you can stop 360 cycling.


Cause you're not going to be creating the same things happening again and again. So that's the first pillar of, of that 180 messages. So good. I mean, I'm, I guess my curiosity, even knowing like further, like, uh, Yeah. And that the listener doesn't know is how in the, how were you able to break the mentality factors of what had been created over?


Okay. If this is three years with Jesus, 16 years of coaching and investigating and scientifically serving and like understanding the universe, but not really understanding the universe, do you feel like God was able to open. Manipulate in a, in a good way. Now you blee create understanding for you, like almost instantly, or did you feel like it was a book that too was like, hold on, let me unlearn so that I can relearn.


Okay. It's a little bit of yes and no. Yes. And yes, because here's the thing so much of self-development and self-improvement in the whole thing. Actually comes from the Bible.


And until I read the Bible, I did not know this, but as I was actually like one of the first things was okay, I want to get to know who God is. And the first place I went was the Bible that had been sitting on my shelf that was gifted to me years ago. And I went and I opened it up and I started reading.


And as I was reading, I'm like, what's. That's where that came from, or Jesus is the one that said that first. So it's almost like really it is from the Bible. It's just been extrapolated and manipulated or altered to fit whatever concept someone was buying into or believing and pulling others into. It's interesting.


Not knowing, cause I literally. Pay attention to what my week is until it's the day of the week. Right? I do this intentionally so that I can say focus in my present moment. My present day and on Sunday was Sunday night. No Saturday night before my kiddos got home, I was, I caught myself saying something about, I won't say their name in this space, but, um, not in a gossiping way, but in a.


Oh, almost. And I'm gonna say this in a guilty realm, as I'm reflecting on it in a self-righteous way like that. I wouldn't be with this person alongside this person. And I was saying it to a group of people. So I was saying it confidently, like it wasn't a question. I was like, this is my belief system towards this.


And later that evening I was questioning or maybe God was prompting me to question, why is that true? And it was the conversation around Scientology and I realized. I said this thing and I actually don't even fully know what Scientology. And so I went on this little hunt. I started watching this Netflix documentary simultaneous to Google and YouTube and all this different stuff.


And I told my husband the next night I was like, I looked it up for like an hour and a half. And before I went to sleep and I still don't know what it is, I'm still really confused. And. Sounds like a bunch of self-help like videos and like a belief system. It doesn't really sound like a cult, but I know that there might be cult tendencies to it.


And he was like, that's really, that's really all it is. And I'm like, so why do people hate it so much? And he was like, I would love it. It depends on who's talking who you're talking to. And so I think the reason I bring this up now, one is in transparency and vulnerability to like, even as an ordained minister, Like it's important for us to go and research so that in the apologetics of our faith, why Jesus and why, if I'm confronted with that, that I have a backbone to stand up and understand what's the variability, other than knowing that God is the God of all things.


And I think this part that you're speaking to is like, it was God's idea in the first place. And so even in the manmade development of something from 1950, which is when it was originally. They're got ideas. They're not ideas. Right. And why people think they're so good is because they're from God. And so just knowing that there is some manipulation that happens along the way in our self-righteousness that can then deter it away from like having a God idea to turning into just it's a good idea.


The supernatural, I can speak to that for myself too. That, um, you know, fundamentally what I'm coaching people through hasn't necessarily changed. It's all still there. And it was. Brought out of me through God and of God. I just didn't know it at the time, but then looking back at it and never having spoken of him and where the foundation of it all came from is what's different.


And I mean, he's just infused into everything I do now, because that's again, where it came from. That is the truth of where it is and where it's come from. So. Yeah, it's it's and it's been an evolution, you know, in the last three years. And I know it will continue to be


like, you know, pulling through and that's one of the things that I'm really good at is like, let's pull it through more and get to that core of things. Yeah. And even earlier today, I was just praying alongside some of my clients, like I like to call them partners, but when I say that people get. And so, uh, it's this understanding that I was praying over the fact that like, I'm so grateful that you've kept parts of yourself hidden from me.


I'm so grateful that each day is an adventure with you. That everyday I get to wake up and I get to open the Bible. And if I've read the same exact parable, a thousand times over, you're going to show me something new. And if we are supposed to be called into childlike faith, isn't every time they play tag fun, isn't every time they play imagination, an exciting new adventure for them.


And so if we just approach the Bible in that way, if we approach our prayer life in that way, God speak to me or speak through me in this moment. We. That all struck wonder, and we get into this place where again, it goes back to what you're saying. It's recognition of God. It's, it's surrender to God and it's asking him for help.


Yeah. It's so cool. It's so cool. Yeah. Um, I think, I think again, like, this is why God had me on the path that I was to be able to. Really speak to and share with people no matter where their faith walk is, they're non-believers and believers. It doesn't matter who I'm connecting with. I trust that he's always guiding and bringing those people into my sphere and realm, and that I'm able to speak to both places.


Again, I know what it's like without him and with him. And regardless of where you're at in your walk with him, even if you're the most faithful person, there are areas of the 360 that are blocking that ability to see and know him more intimately and deeply. And as you're sharing, it just makes me think of like what you said at the very beginning.


And it's this knowing of an unashamed life. To just like be in that space of just, I don't have it all figured out. You don't have it all figured out. We have what we have figured out and that's what makes us good teachers and good coaches because people are not there yet. And yet there's plenty of mentors that I have to lean on in order to.


Get to where they've gone and go through what they've gone through and learn from the best. And so I think that's why it's really important to surround yourself with other believers who have gone through something different than you, so that when that season does arise, again, we go back not into the either cycle of shame or the cycle of self-righteousness, but we raise our hands and say, Hey, I need help in this realm.


I'm not doing well today. Whether it's anxiety, whether it's depression, whether it's curiosity towards something. Being exposed to you all the time. Um, I just think the biggest thing is open conversation and that's why I started this podcast was like, I don't want people to feel alone and I definitely don't want them to feel a sense of shame if they're in an exploratory season of their life of is this real?


Is this not? And it's given me because I am open to that navigation with the GPS always centered towards God. But open for other people to like signal in and kind of tune into, I believe the only true. Absolutely. I mean, it's, we can only see what we can see through the filter in which we've been given and to be able to have those mentors who can see beyond because they've been there and that creates this relate ability.


So not only that, um, you know, knowing that someone is, can support you and help you, but. Uh, relate-ability that creates such a connection and bond is, is huge. I find, um, and, and that humility that we're talking about and not being ashamed and being able to own ownership is one of the key things to being quote unquote successful in life.


And that there's a huge difference between being responsible and taking ownership. So, yeah, I coach a lot on, on ownership and what that means and what that looks like. And you know, where do you take that and how do you do that? Yeah. I love that you guys, I can't even tell you cause like every single time you'll drop a little nugget.


Placing it into the session of therapy or to the book that I've read or to my own storyline. And it could, we could be here for hours if I was like, oh yeah, we did this. I geek out on it. I get so excited because I resonate with that word. So much because our society is all about gaslighting. We're all about divert the attention from me and point the finger at them so that I can look better so that I am right, so that I can stay on my comfortable cycle over here and they can be messed with the enemy can go after them.


And meanwhile, you're actually stuck in the rut yourself. And so. I am all for just like, I'll raise both my hands all the time and be like, yeah, I'm in perfect over here and perfectly perfect just as God intended for me to be. And this is, this is the space that he has me right now in this season. And it's not going to go away until I'm at the right hand of the father.


Anyway. So at any point, if you see me take my hands down and point to myself or point to someone else, you know that I've now removed myself from the state of service. Yeah. And knowing that I, uh, I'm, I'm just figuring out just like the rest of us. Yeah. Well said. I mean, completely the only thing that does, um, that cycle you were talking about is puts you into a place of victimhood.


Yes. I remember when you shared about that. Yeah. The victim villain in here. Um, victims will gaslit they will complain blame point the pinger and like, we do this so unconsciously all the time, you don't even realize, and it's such a form of protection because it does keep us in that comfort zone and like, okay.


Put the attention on them. Not me because when you put it on me, I'm not. And that's, what's underlying everything and we know that's not true at all, but it's one thing to know that. And another to like actually live into it naturally every moment, every day, or as much as possible, um, which we can not do on our own.


Yeah, it's this conversation has been so packed. So stacked. If you guys don't know Alexandra, you need to get in all the things. I mean, you're the baller coach on Instagram, right. And you've got the baller coach kingdom on Facebook group. So be involved there. What other things do you have any like specific coaching programs coming up that you're launching or anything right now that we can share?


Yeah, I do. Um, so I have the 180 method mastering life, um, and that ink part is really important. It's not master life, it's mastering life. Um, that's a 12 week group coaching program and I have several of those starting throughout the year. Um, so they pretty much run every 12 weeks. So there's that. Um, and you can find that on both Instagram or Facebook or my website, the baller coach.com and see when the next one is.


And then you and I are doing something special. We are, we are. Uh, stay tuned because it's going to be really good. But if you are enjoying this conversation, we are 100% want you guys to be along for the journey of what's to come of at further exploration, but also for the research sharing and methodology.


Because I think it's great to have these hyperbolic conversations, but just as we started this conversation with something tangible, we always want to leave you with that same sense of tangibility. And so having a connected masterclass, that's going to be more than just an hour. We're going to be with you for a longer period of time.


So we can actually extrapolate on what it is that you're working through. It's going to be amazing. And she uses something that I love so much and it's not working on mindset. It's working on soul set. TBD. Yeah.


I love you sister. Thank you for being here. You guys be sure to tag us when you're listening to this episode and share it with a friend who you think might be stuck somewhere. Uh, we just want to see them on the other side, hanging out the good life, right? Whatever that's called guys.


Hey, y'all it's me again. Before you go, let's solidify the flame that was ignited within you today by sharing the spark with your own community, whether it's mentally, physically, emotionally, relationally, or spiritually, I would love for you to take the step right now by declaring your takeaway, snap, a pic of the episode and share it on your stories.


And you can tag me and the guest and we will surely feature you on our end, says, Hey, you might even unlock a new accountability buddy in me or them. We're totally in this together. And we appreciate the extra step taken. I would be so grateful if you even took the extra step, come on and give you that extra size and leave a review on iTunes.


For the podcast listening app that is of your choice. I'm going to be featuring your thoughts in fact, and this will be so fun and upcoming episodes. So you'll not only hear your name on the show, but maybe even your passion project or whatever, big shout out you want me to make. So please, as a fellow writer, leave some words that I can attest to.


And I can't wait to read what you have to say. Thanks again for being a loyal listener. And I hope to meet you in person soon at one of the events that. Speaking at or hosting. And I say we, because the fit and vape team could not do this without you until next time blessings over your joy, health, wealth, and wholeness.


This is a fit faith way. .


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