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  • Tamra Andress

Fierce Empathy with David Waldy



David Waldy is a personal growth junkie and he loves coffee and loves to read. There's a lot of parallel between us, which I absolutely love. The way that he shows up in the world uniquely as a life and business strategist, speaker, co-founder of Generation Impact Consulting, and how he shows up for entrepreneurs across the globe truly intrigued me.

It was with this key phrase - showing up with fierce empathy. After my own quarter life breakdown. I understood empathy at a level that I could never have ever possibly understood before, but David gives us a new perspective.

You've got to listen to every single minute because it's such a rich conversation. He's a rich human being.

I value you, I treasure you, and I can't wait to see how you apply fierce empathy to your life, business relationships, and all other things.

🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉Grow your Business for God's Sake! 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉 Come join us November 5th - 7th in Lexington, Kentucky, as we join together with Glenn Lundy and all the Breakfast With Champions speakers to create some magic! Get your ticket now!

https://www.eventbrite.com/e/grow-your-business-for-gods-sake-tickets-166089996651

About David:

I'm the "FIERCE EMPATHY" coach. As a life + business strategist, speaker, and co-founder of Generation Impact Consulting, I'm honored to say that I've worked with thousands of entrepreneurs from across the globe. I've shared the stage with some world-renowned influencers and provided consulting for 7, 8, and 9 figure brands. My favorite humans are my wife Jessie and our two kiddos Emmi & Bear. Most of my attention is focused on equipping and empowering entrepreneurs to make more money doing what they love, so they can live more and give more. All without sacrificing what matters most. My team and I provide high-performance coaching and consulting for entrepreneurs operating within the online education and personal service spaces by helping them master their business systems, emotions, and personal habits. I'm obsessed with helping high-vibe entrepreneurs create more alignment, flexibility, and income in their lives and businesses. I believe fierce empathy is the key to unlocking success in all areas of life and I'm on a mission to help others learn how to apply it in every area of their life and business. My hope is to inspire others to let go of their limiting beliefs and put in the work required to see their dreams realized as they never stop becoming the leader they said they would be. I am also a personal growth junkie, avid non-fiction read, coffee snob, and lover of all things outdoors.

Where to Find David:

https://www.linkedin.com/in/davidwaldy/

https://www.instagram.com/davidwaldy/

https://www.facebook.com/davidcwaldy/

Show Notes: Fierce Empathy with David Waldy

Okay to say, I've never had this topic of conversation on this podcast. That's about to enter into season four and over 200 recordings of the show says a lot, not only about the human who's coming to the table with something new, but also about the expansion opportunity on a consistent basis for us to show up and learn.


David Waldy as a personal growth junkie and he loves to read, and he also loves coffee. And I love that he calls himself a coffee snob and he loves to be outdoors. So do you know anything about me? And you know what he just said? There's a lot of parallel, which I absolutely love needing humans that have similarities, but this word that he used, this phrase ology this way that he shows up in the world uniquely as a life and business strategist, speaker, a co-founder of generation impact consulting and how he shows up for entrepreneurs across the globe truly intrigued me.


And it was with this key phrase allergy. I hope you never forget it. Showing up with fierce empathy. I had a crazy transformation happened in my life after my quarter-life crescendo. Newer. Do you like it? Anyway, after that quarter life. I understood empathy in a level that I could never possibly understand, but David takes a new perspective and empathy and how it started with frustration and then your sleep loving it at the very same time after identity and after learning to use his gifts and talents to its advantage.


So whatever part of this just touched your spirit and enticed you to listen. You've got to listen to every single minute because it's such a rich conversation. He's a rich human being and follow him on LinkedIn, Instagram, and Facebook at David Waldy like Waldo, but with a Y and be sure to just tag him, show up for him, just like you guys do for me all the time.


I value I treasure you. And I can't wait to see how you apply fierce empathy to your life, business relationships, and all other things.


Welcome to the fit and faith podcast. It is an acronym representing founders, innovators, and trailblazers who are looking to live a life wholly fully, authentically, and truly fit a space for us to connect on the raw real stories of mind, body, and soul alignment of entrepreneur. And kingdom leaders. I'm your host, Tamra and dress.


And this podcast, isn't like the cookie cutter interview experience. I've been coined the entrepreneurial rabbi. And so we do go there unscripted, no matter how far wide, deep or high there is. My desire is to see people rise from the inside, out, into their greatest calling, by sharing their truest stories, talents and tips as a purpose activator and brand builder.


I believe our successes and failures are derived from who and whose we are not what we do, but strategy and vision are equally as important to the mission. So let's cut to the chase together and get fit in faith.


Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We live in an action with the one and only David and Waldy and I'm so excited to have you on today, brother. Thanks for being here. I am so excited. We are going to have a blast today. Thank you. I'm honored. I'm so excited. So we got connected originally via clubhouse, which feels like a lot of people are right.


And then Instagram, like just chatting and DM-ing and getting to know you and seeing how you show up for the world. It's inspiring. Um, and we actually have a lot in common, so I'm excited to dive in. I also have two kiddos and my husband's nickname growing up was there, which is one of your kids' names.


So I thought that was really cool. Um, but I love what you do and I love how you show up specifically in the way that you are gifted. Uh, the knowing that you show up with fierce empathy and that's actually what you're also training your. To step into, and I think that's a hard thing to understand both in entrepreneurship, but also just in the realm of, of being right.


Uh, but I I'm curious where that stemmed from and how you got involved in that specific genre of, of work. Yeah. That's a great question again. Thank you. I, um, I don't know if I told you this before I dive into fierce empathy. I tell you we've got a third one on the way,


but I don't know what to, after bear is going to be another boy. I don't know what to name another John or something, but I'd love to get creative. That's awesome. We're going to get creative, but fierce empathy. Yeah, that's a great question. And I guess going back, you know, a lot of. Growing up. I don't know if you were like this Tamra empathy was always soft, right?


It's always very soft sometimes. Like, especially for men, it seems to be more of an, a feminine feature it's like soft and cushy and loving and gentle. And, um, I was always, I hated it about myself. I was my number one strength on every strengths test I ever did. And I was like, what the heck? Like, come on.


I'm supposed to be Mr. Macho man. And so I started to, you know, uh, when I was, since I was a kid I've been obsessed with reading and personal development, I've been obsessing over personal development since I was a teenager. Just understanding, trying to understand more and more about who we are and how we work and what it looks like for success and achievement.


And that tied into very much my heart for it, for ministry, for Jesus and for, for the things that I've done, not only within the church, but also in my business. And so, uh, through the process of learning more and more about myself learning more and more. How God created me. I started to take that kind of that resentment and turn it into more of, okay, what does this actually mean?


I'm fighting against the natural part of who I am of being an empathetic human and trying to resist that. Why am I so resistant to it? And what I found was that I had a gross misunderstanding of what empathy can be and what it can look like and how effective it is in not only serving and loving and helping other people, but in also bringing ourselves to give ourselves permission to express what we want and what we need, which a lot of times, impasse, if you know, are very bad about expressing what they want and what they need.


So sure. But yeah, so it, it kind of, uh, it came out of a lot of pain, a lot of challenge, a lot of difficulty, a lot of just discovering myself a lot of hands and knees before God just asking for clarity, envision direction. The biggest thing for me Kimra was I had a mentor mind that, uh, have you done any of those strengths tests and personality tests?


I think they're amazing. Super fun, but I have one that stumped me because across the board I was in a class with probably like 50 people. Everyone had, there was four ratings. There was, it was like cleric, sanguine, melancholy, and phlegmatic. Right. Um, and I never know if I say that last thing that you're saying when I could, yeah.


You could pick that. I got dead flat, even across every score. And they pulled it, like pulled me aside and was like, Hey, I don't know if I've ever seen this before. And I was like, yeah, thanks. This, this kind of sucks. Cause it means, I don't know what the heck, like what is the one right there? Like, actually this is really fascinating because if you take that with Myers-Briggs and you take that with Clifton strengths finders and all these, like the Enneagram and things like that, what I started to discover is like my top five strengths are empathy, adaptability, connectedness, inclusivity, and.


And I started to realize that part of my strengths were being able to step into whatever situation was needed. If, if I, if there's nobody saying, when at the party, I'm going to be the guy, like we're going to have fun, but if I, you told me this, I'm like, I need you on my team. I need you. I need you. I need you to be adaptable.


That's, that's the hardest thing. I think for some people and for me, it, um, it just came natural. It's like reading the room, reading people like really, really being in touch and even on a spiritual sense, like learning more about discerning the spirits and what that looks like on a spiritual giftedness side of how to, to really understand, um, beyond the facade, beyond what we just see in present.


And so I got really frustrated when I took that test where I was dead even. And, uh, my mentor at the time she said, she said, David, this is actually an incredible asset. This. Very unique. And so it took me from feeling like depressed and down about like, I don't have any, like,


this is, this is a gift and I have not been treating it like a gift for most of them. I've been treating it as this. Why did you make me this way? God, why am I, why am I oriented this way? And so as I started to embrace that, uh, over time, it kind of developed into this whole thing that turned into my entrepreneurial endeavors and sales and marketing and working with people.


And, uh, and then most recently, and speaking of which pause, congratulations on your new book launch. I actually, um, so real fascinating aside, my tagline for you. Has been never stopped becoming dead serious. So when I saw always, I was like, I'm buying this book, I bought it on Amazon. I get the message already.


That's amazing. I love that. Thanks. Yeah, but it's, it's something that I just, I always struggled with again, but through the process, I started to understand more and more about empathy and developing this concept or philosophy. I call fierce empathy and fierce is typically kind of this almost opposite.


And like it's, you know, ferocious almost violent or you're lying. And so that's actually, um, the book that I'm writing right now, um, which I'm super excited about, which I was so happy to see yours. I was like, I was like, Tamra's crushing. God's got you. He does my inside tricks. Oh, please, please do. But that, that was the origin.


Kind of stepping into that as a superpower and finding kind of my unique angle of how I see the world and being able to empower and serve other people. And I've found it be, uh, become something that's not just immensely useful in business and marketing and sales. And, uh, it's also really, really important for spirituality, for families, for even our health and how we see ourselves.


And so it's like this philosophy I just adhere to, like, as you're saying it, cause I didn't really know the context of it. Right. I liked the words. I like the language I was actually thinking of like, um, fiercely empathetic leaders and like what that looks like. Um, because I feel like there's an entire study just around that.


Um, but I have a question first and then I want to tell you like where that stems from, what is your Instagram? So my Enneagram is I am a three wing either two or four, depending on the day that I take. Okay. Okay. So I was curious cause as you're talking about it and you're describing yourself, I w I think a lot of, of my husband who's actually.


Okay. And, um, how incredible it is to watch him work a room, which I imagine is probably similar to you in that regard. Um, being able to connect with, uh, lots of different genres of people and kind of fall in line with what they need. Um, but the other component, as you're talking that I was feeling connected towards was the understanding that you had all of these emotions towards your identity or towards yourself, right?


And like, why God did you make me this way? And I feel like if we were to open up a forum about people's identity, based on these different personality tests or, or just the way that they are, whether they had taken the test or not, they were described themselves in three ways, whether or not they saw them as weaknesses or strengths or assets or failure points.


Um, I think I know me personally, and many others who have held those character traits as well. Rather than assets. And it took like times in our life where we realize that, that they actually were benefits and they were actually serving other people and looking outside of self, because if we carry them, it feels like a burden.


But when you shift to what, which is one area that you seem to be very passionate about is like living more so that we can give more. If we focus on the giving of those gifts and talents, they don't feel as heavy because then I just get to give them away all the time versus carry them as a backpack.


Yeah. Yeah. That was part of when I first took, so I've taken Clifton strengths finders, um, three times and every single time I've taken a top five, I've been the same, they've changed order, but that's over the last 15 years. And what's really, really fascinating to me about those is that their strengths, right?


Their strengths they're naturally like innate strengths. And I had another mentor of mine. Tell me one time. They said, David, why don't you take your seven, nine. And make them nines and tens instead of focusing on all your twos and threes and making them fours and fives. And that changed everything for me, because it helped me understand not only, and you know, this, an entrepreneurship is about it's, it's amplifying your strengths and learning how to create a team and an environment and a community to mitigate the weaknesses.


You don't have to be good at everything. It's lean into what your natural giftedness is, and then understand those things that you might call deficiencies or things that aren't, you don't have it's okay. You're human. You're allowed to be human. Yeah. And if we can teach that to our children, right. You being a data and about to have another one, like knowing that if we can teach that to them sooner, I don't feel like I don't think that our in parents or the generation ahead of us, like intended for this to be the case, but I feel like we were expected to be all the things.


And you hear that all the time, even now, like, oh, I can't. How do you do all of that? I'm like, well, I don't do all of it. People don't perceive it that way. They assume because you're quote unquote busy, which I can't stand that terminology anyway, but they assume you're doing all of it by yourself. And I'm like, I did not hit a bestseller by myself.


I had a team who helped that happen. A whole team who helped me put on a conference and yet one person, because that one person might be in the limelight is getting all of the attention. All my accolades go to my team. I'm like, y'all did this. I just showed up to say yes, like they did, but in their strings.


Yeah. Yeah. And that's, I mean, that's a beautiful part. I think, of, of the conversations that I have with people and like you, myself, others that are actually walking in every single day and dedication to living out our calling, living out our purpose, living out our passion. What I've found is that when we go all in, on those strengths and who we've been created to be.


Especially for those that are on the empathetic side. A lot of times people are hesitant to pursue their dreams because they think that this is a zero sum game. If I win someone else loses and it doesn't have to be that way, is that when we recognize every one of us define success differently. Right. I don't know.


Like, so with Tamra, what's, what's one of your big dreams you want to, you want like a chalet house in Switzerland or a beach house in Fiji? Like what does making material, sorry. Fiji sounds phenomenal, but, uh, I would, my, my huge heart is to be able to have a place of peace and play for others to be able to establish their passion.


So what does that mean? It's, it's a beach house. Yes. On the ocean where there's lots of adventure there, feet, preferably, uh, to be able to release, find alignment and then step into their purpose thereafter. So kind of, not a healing. Well, yeah, a healing zone, um, for people to, to manifest an incubator. I love that.


That is absolutely beautiful. And here's, what's crazy. Is that of all your listeners? There's maybe two that want the same. Yeah. Right. And I think that's what we often, like, I don't want that. I love that you want that and I will support it and I'll do everything I can to help make that a reality. But that's, what's beautiful is that every one of us define our, our version of success differently.


So you winning and creating that. What's beautiful about a team and, and everyone, you know, everyone says it's lonely at the top. Like, no, it's not. If you take people with you, it doesn't have to be right. It doesn't have to be. And if you focus on what God has placed inside of your heart and you take people with.


You can win and they can win at the same time. You leaning in inspires and motivates and encourages. And it's this beautiful synergy that happens because you're going after the things that are inside of your heart. And I love that. I love that you give your credit to the team because I'm the same way is that we couldn't do anything without, and, you know, I had this conversation with them a lot and I have this conversation because, and I'm sure you do too.


We speak into people who are entrepreneurial, right. We speak into the visionary a lot and the visionary needs the people. If you're going to talk to a specific test and I'm thinking of like the Lords, the stars, the wealth dynamics test. Have you taken that one? I have not seen it. I've heard of it. Oh, it's good.


It's good. So there's like Lord and mechanic and they're like operators and they supporters and creators who actually support the star. So star is like someone who's good on camera, someone who's going on stage, probably like the two of us from also paralleling to our Instagram three. But if you go and you're like, Hey, how's your accounting look today?


Did you check your books? I'm like ma Nope, sure did it sure did it. Right. And, and I should. I know that I should, but I just don't want to. I'm just here for the party and the money will come later. And so it seemed, and for us, like, as we speak to visionaries and entrepreneurs, for them to recognize this conversation is so vital for their success, but more so importantly for the success of everyone they're connected to, because one, we know you can't do it alone.


If you're doing it alone, I'd like to meet you because you likely are just either very eager to see, or you're not married. That's for dang. Sure. I can do anything when it comes to mind, marriage, without my husband. I specifically saying this because I want everyone to understand. And I think everyone has a purpose in entrepreneurship.


What does that mean? It doesn't mean that you are the visionary doesn't mean that you are the star. It means that you have a purpose that is connected to somebody else's purpose. It's why the kingdom is a kingdom of community and relationship. And that's ultimately what God would have us do is to raise your hand and say, here's where I'm really good and strong.


And when all of us come together, I had this vision and connection to the rainbow the other day. Surprise, surprise. If the rainbow is just red and. Yeah. If it, the rainbow was just yellow, it would be the sun. Right. But all together, there's this vast array of beauty that's connected because each color stands out uniquely.


And that's our role in the world is to stand together and say, Hey, we're all going towards the pot of gold together, right? Like I need you and you need me for this unison to happen. And for the outcome to be what it is that God would have it be. Amen. I think one of the hardest parts too, though, Tamra on this note is that there's a lot of people that they feel bad or they feel selfish or they feel greedy or they feel wrong to raise their hand and say, here I am, here's how I can serve.


This is what I can do. And there's almost this false humility that causes, I see this all the time in entrepreneurs is that they're, they're so heart oriented and service oriented and giving, which is a beautiful, powerful thing. But there's still this thing. As far as my, my perspective, looking at. Is that there's still this, this misalignment from who, who God has said that they are.


And so there's this identity issue where they they're so scared of arrogance and greed and the corruption, everything. So they they're like, well, I'm over. I, I, I maybe, and they never actually step out in boldness and say, no, I can do this. I don't know if I can help, but I'm here to try this. These are my gifts.


These are my, these are the things that I want to be able to share with other people. And that's one thing I wish that more entrepreneurs would do, especially in, in their marketing and their sales and their content creation and everything they're doing is, is know that it is part of our responsibility to shine.


Like that's the, the light has to shine from within us. And if your heart, right, if your heart is saying no, here I am sending. Right. That's different. Like, well, you could pick me sometime. Do you want to buy my stuff maybe? And I see it a lot. And so I love this conversation. Well, I think too, if, if we go again, I'm going to keep going back to our children.


It sounds like I'm a really good parent. I have a lots of flaws in my parenting, but as we're having this time to do that, that's really good because a lot of stuff that I worked through in my adult life, and you're going to find this out. As you read, the book has been through therapy has been through personal development, but through the lens of God and understanding what is alignment, right?


We use this word in conjunction with balance or in juxtaposition of balance alignment, being vertical understanding of self like interior versus horizontally serving or giving out to the world. I think if you're, if you're out of alignment and you're trying to give, give, give, you will find depletion and you will find loss.


But if we are vertically aligned through the love of the father and the identity that is. Yeah, we can raise our hands, but as children we're told there's no I in team. Right. And if there's no I in team and there's no I in the kingdom, then we all have to mesh together and nobody can stand on the pulpit and nobody can say, and raise their hand as I'm really good at this.


In fact, God would have us just like suppressed to the fact that he's the only one that's elevated, but we know that Jesus literally said that you will do far greater things than I have done. And therefore we have to rise to the call to be able to say that, yes, there is this incredible thing inside of me.


So what we've been doing as parents, in order for our children to not have this same deficit as I had, as my husband has had is we ask them all the time, like, what are you really good at? And we have them, like, what are you most proud of in your. What is something that you think makes you beautiful and did you should see the way that they clam up and they're seven and eight or almost seven, seven and eight.


And I'm thinking to myself, whoever told you or anything, but these amazing things, how has the world already gotten a hold of you so much that you don't have the confidence to speak up and say what you know, you're good at? They know they're good at it. And yet there's this component of, of blanketed suppression over the fact that they are good because humility and ego, they fight the flesh fights with the, with the principalities of darkness.


And so I think it's really important for us as leaders, to not only example this, to drive our team, to that state of elevation, to, to remind them that there might not be any I and team that there is an I with an every single one of us, because the great I am existed. Yeah. So it takes all the eyes. I, I am, I am take me.


Right. I love that because it's, we talk about that being the most powerful phrase in the English language as I am, and it's fascinating that the English translation for what God decided to name himself when he's, you know, Moses is like, well, who do I say semi? I am. Right. And I've been practicing something very similar with, with my kids is, uh, we talk about affirmations a lot, but I think a lot of times people misunderstand that those are real, real identity challenges.


Where when you start speaking out, I am statements that are in alignment with God's word and what he's spoken over you. A lot of times when you start doing that, you don't believe what you're speaking. You don't feel it. You, you feel like a hypocrite. Like when I first started doing them a couple of years ago, I had someone challenge.


Like you got to look yourself in the eyes in the mirror and say these things. And I'm like, this is BS. Like, I don't believe any of this. This is not like at all. Over time. I started to realize that this identity, that what you're talking about, that kind of, that suppression of letting that off and allowing the kingdom to flow in and through you, because if we're, if we're made in his image, what is his core image?


His core image is, is a creator. So if we're not actively participating with the creation and going, and creating and becoming and doing always becoming never stopped becoming right. If we're not doing that, we're rejecting the very identity that he's placed on us. And we're actually doing ourselves and other people at grave disservice because we're not able to step into everything he created us for.


And then we wonder why we're lacking fulfillment and there's no joy, or we're not content, or we're slipping into anxiety or depression, these things. And it's very, very interesting that I am. And, and the affirmations like you're talking about as well for your kids of self-affirming. It's not an arrogant thing.


It's a confidence thing. It's a humility to say, I'm willing to acknowledge that my father in heaven has said these things about me and I'm going to take ownership of them so I can become everything that he's created me to be. Yeah. And in that is the best thing. And I think a lot of times people feel like when they raise their hand to something that there's a perfectionism that has to come alongside that.


Right. That there's no way if I raise my hand and say, I'm really good at this. And then I don't live up to those expectations, what then? But it's the knowing that that's exactly why we are called is because we have to utilize by faith, his ability to meet us in those, um, steps of obedience, because I might be.


Really great at something, but the only full greatness comes when I partner with him. And that it's, that co-creation not the egotistical way of I've got this because I lived a life like that for quite a few year and it didn't turn out so well because I didn't have anything. And so I would love you. You mentioned earlier about some of the hardships that you walked through, even as having access to the personal development space.


So early, I'm curious what those might look might have looked like and how you then access those affirmations again. Yeah. So, um, probably very similar to you. Tamra I've been through a lot of stuff in therapy was very useful to help extract some of that and to recognize things that I had suppressed, but I think, um,


I would say coming, coming out of high school, I had a full ride scholarship, academic scholarship that I turned down. I did not want to pursue it because I did not feel it was an alignment right. For, for what I had. And I realized now on the post end, it was kind of a shove it to my parents who are very highly educated because I, and I went into a two year internship program.


It was focused all on ministry development, leadership development, interpersonal communication, strengths, develop all those types of things. And through that process is where I really fell in love with the empathy side of who I am. And then the personal growth, uh, through that process was always oriented around, um, was around business, was about around leadership, was around sales and marketing.


And so I ended up working my way up in, uh, in a sales position becoming a top 1% sales producer of $400 million a year company, uh, mid twenties making the American dream glass corner office company, car company card six, figure salary like. And I was, I was suicidal. I was absolutely to the end and I've got pictures that I took of myself in the mirror, just, um, about 30 to 40 pounds heavier than I am today.


Just working 60, 70, 80 hours a week. I'm like, what am I missing? Why, why, what is going on? And I had, um, I had a mentor of mine. We sat down at a little Mediterranean restaurant. I can see it here in Columbia, South Carolina, we were sitting there and she, uh, she said, David, I don't know if anybody's ever asked you this question, but who do you want to become?


And in that moment, Tamra, I, something inside of me shifted because I had never been asked that question before. I we've all been asked to go to like, well, what do you want to do? Like, what do you want to do when you grow up? You know, what do you want to do? Right. I started sitting. I was like, well, I guess probably Jesus.


So she's like, you can't, that's no option is not on the table. And I said, I said, well, honestly, I mean, if I she's like, is there anyone that is on the planet today, or even in the past that you would say you want to, you know, do what they do or become similar to them in any way, shape or form. And I said so well, honestly, um, with a lot less F words and not the travel schedule, probably Tony Robbins.


And she was like, really, okay, that's interesting. And then she led me down a process of asking me why, you know, and, and just discovering these things. And what I hadn't realized was that my success in sales and marketing had nothing to do with me being, um, you know, a hard, closer, or trying to, you know, really good at all the closing strategies.


It was actually. And everything that I was going into and every sales interaction and every part of a marketing material, that company would put out that it was all oriented around seeing, hearing and understanding people at the deepest level and making sure that I was in a position to actually help them solve the problem they wanted to have solved.


And I didn't realize that until that meeting, she was like, you have such a gift here that, especially in the entrepreneur and the business space of helping other people learn how to sell with empathy, how to market with empathy in a way that's not slimy. That's not salesy. That's not manipulative. That feels aligned.


It feels really good. So both of you have this mutually beneficial relationship where energetically, they're happy to give you money in exchange for what you provide. I was like, well, that's been my whole existence, but do you think other people would want to, she was like, of course other people would want that that's not taught in any of the sales books.


And so that led me into this path of trying to figure out, okay, do I really want to become an attorney? And I was terrified Tamra. I was terrified of becoming an entrepreneur because, um, I had convinced myself of a story that it had destroyed my family. My dad was an entrepreneur. He owned his own veterinary practice.


Um, and my parents ended up getting divorced. We moved thousand miles across the country. Um, a lot of hard, hard, challenging things as a kid. And so I was terrified. And in the process of a year, we had sold our home and bought a new home. I was handed papers for a $40,000 pay cut. I was lied, betrayed, lied about betrayed and slandered in the business because I came forward about some, uh, let's just say less than savory things I saw going on.


Um, my wife and I went through a miscarriage and to top it all off, I ended. If you can imagine the Hollywood movie, the conference table with the big dogs on one side and the kind of the employee. On the other side, I ended up in a conference room with that exact situation with someone standing over me, cursing at me, pointing their finger at me, screaming at me telling me that the only reason that I was still there was because I was a financial asset and they could not afford to lose me because of how much revenue I was generating for the company.


And that my entire team was going to be, let go if they wanted to. And they had X millions of dollars in assets. And so for me, that was, that was it. I got to a point. I came home and I said, babe, I don't know what I've got to do, but I've got to figure this out. I need out of this situation and I've got to step into this.


And it's really fascinating as a fast forward, about eight, nine months. I'll walk in. I turned in my two week notice. I started building things online, trying to learn how to do this whole thing. And 4:57 PM. Tamra. I'm walking out. Where I just get turned in my notice. I'm like, I'm done I'm out. And this was terrifying too, because we're single income family go from six figures to zero.


It was just like kind of a big decision.


And in at 4 57, I'm getting into my truck and I get a ding and yes, I snuck out three minutes early. Don't judge me. We're not judging it on that judging. That's why I'm an entreprenuer. I would never have guessed. I would have never thought that because I'm like peace. It's two o'clock on a Friday. I'm out the boats calling my name.


I get an email. And it's from Tony Robbins and Dean Graziosi. Uh, inviting me to join one of their speaking teams for a company that they were running and they said, congratulations. Um, and during that process, I had been applying and interviewing and trying, cause I wanted to be able to have that as an, I was like, all right, this whole thing about visualization manifestation, let's give it a whirl.


And, um, and it happened. And a few months later I was, uh, flown out to do speaker training with them. And, and, um, that led to meeting business partners, creating a new company and me doing the things that I've been doing. And, uh, it, it taught me a lot through a really incredible season. But the challenge I think was Tamara, is that through all of that, there were just days where I would, I would sit with my wife and I would just cry on the couch.


Um, Not the husband that I want to be, not the father that I want to be, not the leader that I want to be, but not understanding what in the world am I supposed to do. I was always so upset at everyone else. Like, well, this is my calling. Jesus told me I'm supposed to go there and in there. And I'm like, that's great.


He hasn't told me what I'm supposed to do.


And everyone seemed to have it mapped out, but it was through this process of surrender and trust that I was able to, uh, to lean into what God was preparing for me in the midst of one of the most painful and challenging seasons. He was opening these doors. He was closing doors and opening doors. And there was just those nights.


I would sit with my wife and I finally ended up going through this process of trying to understand why, like, why was I doing what I was doing? Why was I committed to it? Why like, what did I want to do? And who did I want to become? And that who did I want to become kept coming up over and over and over again.


And I had finally came to the place where I was able to give myself permission to define that without feeling like I've got to wait for God to tell me exactly what it is. And I trusted that those desires inside of my heart. I said, Jesus, I'm like, he, my eyes fixed on you, but I'm just going to run. I'm going to run.


And I'm going to trust that you'll stop me upside the head sometimes if I need to, but I'm going to stay plugged into community. I'm going to stay plugged into my church body. I'm going to stay accountable. I'm going to have people that will, I will allow to pour into my life and I'm just going to go.


I'm just going to go. And since then, my, my whole life has changed Tamra. Like everything has changed. And I now have the opportunity to work with an incredible team. My business partners, doing coaching consulting, speaking, all. It's bonkers. What is so cool about this specific conversation is I feel like it's one that's not often had, you know, you hear people specifically, people who are in the church body, always talking about purpose and passion and calling and, and everyone's waiting, everyone's waiting.


They're all like when is my call from heaven going to happen so that I can feel like this is exactly the path that I'm supposed to take. This is exactly the time I'm supposed to get out of the boat, my fruit and prosperity and abundance. And all of that is right around the corner from his calling. And I've experienced firsthand as well.


That it's less about the knowing and more about the faith. Right. And it literally says scripturally, like it's what is uncertain? And yet we still pursue that shows our obedience. It shows our faith, it shows our commitment. And so a lot of times I feel like I'm running to nowhere. Like, where are you going?


I don't know. I just know I gotta wake up. I just know I got to go. And they're like, well, what's the goal. Right? A lot of people ask that what's the goals. Have you set your goal? And even as you ask, like what defines success, success is is the play, the piece and the passion, how it manifest that's up to my going and him showing in the process.


And so purpose is not a place it's a becoming experience. No one knows their purpose until they're on the right hand of the father in heaven being like, oh, I was supposed to do that. Yeah. Oh, I fulfilled. Right. You, you cannot possibly comprehend the way that he comprehends. It's it's being in the middle of your book and you're waiting for the final chapter.


I've got no idea. So most days I feel a little muddy. Most days I've feel a little crazy, but at the exact same time, I'm having so much fun. And the way that I know that I'm in purpose. And I'd be curious if you feel the same and it sounds like you do, but for clarity is that I don't run out of energy.


I'm not running out of gas or fuel. This has been me for five years and it was all since literally having that surrender moment and starting to unpack my true identity and truly understanding what alignment meant, not just in my call, but in my call to be whole, which is the mind body, soul, which is where fit fit.


And faith comes from it's. It's not just fitness. It's being, it's the being of the whole human. I I, 100% agree, because I think even on the alignment conversation, you can't be aligned with something unless you've defined what you're aligning with in the first place. And a lot of times, I think, especially as, um, people of faith were like, well, I just want to be aligned with God.


I'm like, okay, let's talk about that. Right? Because it's that word is a lamp unto my feet. I heard this one time before, it's not a spotlight. There's a reason that it's a lamp. That means you can literally only see one or two steps in front of you. Right. You cannot see it. And everyone's waiting for those answers.


And what I've realized is I had a mentor of mine telling me this one time and it was a great question. Uh, he said, he said, David, what if the calling of God is not an expectation to live up to or something to fail, but what if it's a promise to live out. And that when he told me that it, it said, again, something often inside of me is like, what if it is just a promise to live out of?


And I'm free to define whatever this is. And however, I want to go after it, trusting that as, as I go, I'm going to preach saying the kingdom has come upon you. I'm going to heal the sick. I'm going to raise the debt. I'm going to cleanse lepers. I'm going to cast out demons. I'm going to go forward with the mandate of the gospel, carrying the kingdom.


And I'm going to do that through the lens of business. And I'm going to do it aligned because I know that this is the man that I want to become as a husband, as a father, as a leader, as a speaker, as a coach, all these things. And I think that a lot of times, we've, we're scared to, to, to define that because like, but that's not what, like, what does God want me to be?


I'm like, what if God put those desires inside of your heart? Is that like too hard to believe? And I realized, yes, it is hard to believe for something. It can be very, very, very challenging to believe that those desires inside of your heart aren't necessarily intrinsically selfish or greedy or wrong.


What have God is the one that put those inside of your heart. And all he's asking you to do is step out in faith. And in that process, can you stay surrendered every single day saying, God, I'm asking for your wisdom for your vision, for your clarity, but I'm going to go, I'm going to walk by faith, not by sight, and I'm going to lean in and become, because I don't know what that means, but I'm just going to keep becoming so much.


Grace is what that means. That's like the, my most favorite thing about it is that there isn't a definition to it. And I love, I love that that understanding that it's actually out of the calling that we live rather than in pursuit of the calling and you're going to get it wrong. I think that's where the overflow, like the wellspring of life's lives within us.


But if we're actually searching to fill our. It's always going to have a component of emptiness, but if it's coming from the inside out, it doesn't deplete. And so there's so much power to that. And I think one, one of the reasons I'm specifically drawn towards how you show up in the world, because I see this component of mirror example is in the marketplace is in the realm of business.


And there are so many people from a religious quote unquote experience that have been suppressed in that identity that they have to either be poor and working really, really hard as a volunteer or in the ministry of church, whatever that is to them versus operating out of the fact that as a, as a business owner, it is my minister.


Yeah. As, as an entrepreneur, this is my ministry. As a mom, as a wife has all of these things. I operate in business every single day and therefore I am doing the Lord. From the time I wake up to the time I go to sleep and it looks different for everybody else. Quick commercial break. I know I hate these things too, but it's so critical that you grow your business for God's sake.


And I mean, that pun intended with all the love in my heart to get you from a place of ideation to activation, stop dreaming, start doing stand up, start saying yes to the call that God has on your life. We are going to be joining in Lexington, Kentucky with none other than the beautiful rise and grind community with Glenn Lundy, who will be co-hosting this incredible conference.


This is the second annual. And he has taken me under his wing to be able to share the stage to motivate and inspire. And I cannot wait to see you there November 5th through the seventh. If you want to come in for the VIP experience or two doesn't want to come along for VIP, that's all access passes to the speakers and the artists, and you will be able to dine with us in the private rooms with your own special bathrooms.


So. Okay, come one day, two day, three day passes available as well. And we cannot wait as good. And I say to hike your neck, see you there. So talk us through, like, did you ever feel like you were not called into the secular like business realm of things and are they separate it, is it secular versus church?


Is it church or, you know, th this would be a whole nother podcast, but yeah, no, I'll keep it short, but I think that, you know, to your point, there's a whole lot of people that are, there's two parts to this one, especially Christians, faith oriented people in general is that we're waiting on God, waiting on God, waiting on God.


And I believe in the principle of waiting on God, but I also believe there's a whole lot of apathetic, lazy, somewhat entitled human beings, brothers and sisters. I love you and Jesus that are waiting on God when he's just. W what are you waiting? What are you waiting for? Like go. Um, but the question is a great question because it is one of the most challenging things standard that I have had to navigate because part of my orientation early on was to go into full-time ministry.


I felt like I had like this pastoral heart, but I very, very, very clearly there's been very few times that I feel like I've heard, you know, as close to the audible voice of God as possible. It was that my ministry was supposed to be. Uh, ministry outside of the church walls and that it was going to be in the places where people weren't expecting ministry to be happening.


And that the kingdom, the spirit of God would flow in and through me. And it would come through language that resonated and people understood, but they would have no choice because of the power of the holy spirit, but to encounter the living God, because of the life that I was living. And so when I saw Tony Robbins, I saw David Waldy and I saw that type of event again with few SF words.


Exactly. But it wasn't like, Christianese it wasn't through this lens of just like Bible talk Bible. They was very much like how can I orient these things through the lens of business and sales and marketing and bring the principles of scripture and the principles of the kingdom into the secular marketplace.


But I got really hung up on this Tamra. I got really hung up on this because I wanted it to be a ministry, but I also was like, But I want this to be a business. I, and I need this to be a business. Otherwise I'm creating a nonprofit with nonprofits, right? But I need this to be a business. I have to make business decisions.


I have to be a good steward with the money. And I had somebody come confront me like straight up in love, brother of mine. He said, David, you know, what's really interesting. I said, what? So, you know, you talk about like the aesthetic lifestyle and you give everything away and you go, you know, you've been on missions trips.


I've been to Haiti. I've been to the Dominican Republic than the Nicaragua done a lot of missions trips. And he said, the problem is David is that he said, here my heart, that's not hard for you. It's not hard for you to give up everything. It would not be hard for you to sell it all and walk away and go to, if you felt God calling you and pulling you to go live in a third world country and to give your life away, that's not hard for you.


Is it? I was like, no, I would do it in a heartbeat. He said, you know what? It is hard for you. I was like, It was like, what's hard for you as what, if God is calling you to build a multi-million dollar business that affects and impacts lives all over the world and you are incredibly exorbitantly wealthy.


And the only reason that you're going to be entrusted with that is because you have the heart that says, I don't really want that. And it's hard for you because you have this perspective over here. What if the reason there's so much discomfort here is because that's what God is pushing you into because he trusts you with that.


And you're a type of person because that's how I see you Tamra is that he trusts the heart of the people that say, I'm not just in this to make a freaking buck. Like that's like not, I'm not here to help people just make money because they think money's going to, I'm here to help people make money by living aligned with their passion so they can give more, they can live more, they can serve more, they can be more.


And it's simply a resource that's going to flow in and through me. And I'm going to trust what God and I, I broke when he said that I was like, yeah, that's probably the hardest thing I would ever have to do. Going into that. And he's like, that's why, you know, you're on the right path. And I was like, thanks.


That's great.


Exactly. You're like, cool, buddy. I appreciate you. Oh, that's so good. I feel like this is a conversation that more people need to have. There needs to be more of the, like the poking and prodding around the desires of our heart. And it stems from the fact that they don't have to be out of greed. In fact, they're likely not because the dreams that are in my heart are not the same dreams that are in your heart are so many people that I meet.


And I didn't just sit around one day and be like, I'm going to dream today. Nope. Nope. I'm out. And I'm going, right. Especially in motherhood and parenthood and entrepreneurship, like there, I don't take that space and I should probably do it more often. And I'm in a middle of a really cool challenge. I'll tell you about later, but it's this knowing that if we actually sat within those desires and trusted them in the sense of trusting God who put them there and knowing that intuition and gut feeling and coincidence, like they're all good.


Yeah. And so I think if we could understand that the resource piece looks different for everyone, whether it's the finances, whether it's a bushel of babies. I mean, it's, there's so many different resources that can be had. And I think the financial realm is one of the biggest breakthroughs that need to happen within the church, specifically for us to step into our calling for the kingdom, to actually have the authority in the secular realm of business that it actually earns deserves and has the priority within God's eyes to, to have and seek.


And my pastor told me that it was the final meet meeting after my ordination to ministers licensing. And I knew, and I've known my whole life. Like you said, you did all those tests and all of the same came back. I did that my freshman year of college and every single thing said you were going to do businessman.


I didn't know what that meant. Right. Like I knew I wanted to be my CEO. Like that's what I always told myself. I was like the president of all the student governments growing up. And I just knew, I didn't want to work for someone was ultimately what it was. And it's not because I didn't, I couldn't follow rules, but I just didn't want to, I knew I could make the rules and do them better.


And so I got business management across all these counseling things. I was like, oh yeah, I'll go to business school and ended up, you know, starting my own companies right out of school. And so when I had that rug moment where it was just ripped out from under me and I was in that state of suicidal ideation and depression and anxiety and half fast forward, three years later, and I'm sitting in my pastor's.


Entrepreneurship, literally like is in my veins. Like when I think about building a business, I get so excited. I want to know what's the outcome and how is it going to serve on a granular level for somebody? What is it doing? How is it like what's the heartbeat behind it? And I was so scared. I felt insignificant enough to say here I am being called into doing something for the kingdom.


And yet my heart, my thought pattern, my flesh is pulling me back into the entrepreneurial realm. And he just simply didn't say much other than one sentence that has stuck with me ever since. And he said, God will give you grace for your space. And everyone's space looks different. I'm not saying that you shouldn't be called to start a church or you shouldn't be started a nonprofit and go to other countries and sell it all.


That's not what David and I are saying. We're saying instead that where God will make you is exactly where he's probably made you before and likely a place that you've experienced pain to no different than you in the boardroom and that experience and being like this was terrible. I never want somebody to feel this way, utilizing their gifts and talents, which you've now been able to flip on a script and allow so many people to stand in that space.


And it's, it's really beautiful. Thank you. I agree. There's an incredible book by augmented. Dino was called the greatest salesman in the world. I recommend it to anyone. Have you read it Tamra? I haven't. I haven't, but you got to get this. I have every one of my clients read it and they have to read it every single day, three times a day.


Once they've gone through, it's not the whole book, there's like they read chapters, but there's a, there's a chapter in there that talks about, um, that if you asked 10,000 men to define success, every one of them will define success differently. But every one of us define failure, the same and failure is our inability to reach our goals.


And so when we go back to kind of your initial premise of the goal setting and defining these things, I think when we are, when we have these desires, The best litmus test is the first part of that burst trust in the Lord with all your heart, don't lean on your own, own understanding in all your ways, acknowledge him.


And he will direct your path. There's like trust in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart. Those things are, if, if someone is asking, what is this desire that I had? Is it the flesh or is it Jesus? Is it something in between? Is it the enemy? Just like trying to pull me off track is like, do you trust in the Lord with all your heart?


Well, yeah, of course. Then go, right. And they're like, does that easy? I was like, well, I mean, if you will eat the Bible. Yes. Yes. It's so true though. And that's the hesitancy that I think is holding literally so much of the church, quote, unquote back is just, they feel like, is it the right time? They start asking all these questions.


And they, we were talking about this earlier is, is the fact that we actually give Satan more authority just by speaking over the fact that he's inhibiting us from doing something when it has nothing to do. Mm, it's ourselves. It's our own flesh and our own mind because there isn't that trusting factor.


Like we're not willing to surrender at all because what if, what if, what if, what, what if you lose something that you've been able to create and cultivate on your own to gain something that's better. Yeah, but there's that in-between season. And I see clients experienced this a lot. They're like, I know that this is my calling.


I am confident. And when I get to pour out and I see the outcome, it's exactly what God would have me do. I feel completely filled to the brim, but my bank account isn't showing me. So what do you, how do you help people in that situation? So in that situation, I remind everyone and myself included that the vast majority of our life is made up of stories.


Our. Is that the stories in our head have a propensity to be extremely negative oriented. The stories we make up about other people, the stories we make up when we're sitting in line at the drive-thru, the stories we make up in our head about why our food hasn't come out yet. Right. They're all stories, they're all made up.


But for some reason, if we think about it, right, the assumptions and judgements and conclusions and bias and prejudices and all these things, they're not actually founded on anything rational. They're just a made up story. Right. And so I started asking the question, why is it that we default to that instead of to abundance instead of to breakthrough instead of to potential instead of to limitless, like, and I was realizing it's because that's, that's.


Like that is our sin carnal nature that is, is leading us through that because it's incredibly hard to walk in the spirit and recognize that we have a God with an unlimited bank account that can do anything and everything at a moment's notice, um, miracles, crazy things happening, right. Stuff like, and why is it that it's so hard for us to believe this?


And it's because a lot of times we're not walking in the spirit, we're not fully submitted to, to God. So when you have these people that are like, I see it, I see the vision. Like I want it, but the bank account, right, the bank account is a big one. People are like, but the bank account is not showing it. I believe Tamra that a lot of times in that moment there is it's it's God giving us an opportunity to say, are you going to lean into the abundance of my spirit?


Or are you going to lean into the scarcity of the flesh? And are you going to lean into the abundance of my kingdom? Uh, kingdom without limits without end infinitely more than you could ever ask for, or imagine, or are you going to lean into the lack and the problems and the issues and the thing. And that's one of the things that I think we forget is that alignment, especially when you know, what you want does not mean a removal of problems or challenges aligned.


Why am I having all these problems?


It's it's so it's, it's really hard, but that's the process of becoming is that I believe that that in the same way that Abraham was tested in the same, there's so many stories of, of the testing is because we serve a loving and good father. And I believe as stewards, like for the word, I know a lot of times there's an old word, a steward of someone placing responsibility, carrying that responsibility is stewarding over.


Is that a lot of times, I wonder if it, if it's not a pass, fail from God, he's not like trying to judge us. He's like, are you, are you really committed to. Do you really want this? Because if so, there's a price to be paid. And part of that price is you letting go of everything that you thought was okay. And that former identity and all of that that's, I think that's the process of sanctification is stepping into that.


Not only in our faith, but in our lives. And then when you can look at that end goal and say, I see it, it's almost there. It's stepping in and saying, okay, God, I trust you, but I'm not going to sit around and wait. I'm going to be as resourceful as I possibly can with this head, this heart, and these two hands, the community, the people that I've surrounded by, and I'm going to go, and I'm going to trust that in that process, you're going to close the right doors.


You're going to protect me. You're going to shield me. You're going to guide me because I will stay submitted. And I know that, I know that. I know that I believe this is possible. And I, I find Tamra somewhere in between here and there. It shifts from belief to convince. You believe it's possible, but then everybody's like, but is it possible for me?


Right. You get that all the time. And in the step-by-step process, there comes a point where you're like, wait, my business has gone from a hundred thousand to 200,000, it's gone from 200,000 to 500 or whatever it is, like my family, my kids. And you're like, wait, now it's jumping from here to here is no longer this while I believe it's possible.


It's like, no, I can see it. I'm convinced that this is actually possible. But the only way that happens is you just can't stop moving forward. Yeah. I have a really like simple example, a parallel to parenthood, because I think when we're talking about money, whether you're on whatever echelon of, of bracket, right.


Um, sometimes there can be a sense of shame just towards that. Right. But like 200,000 they're like, that would, that would change my world if I made that much money. And I'm thinking of my audience and some of my dear friends and I thinking specifically of this example, which is so sweet. And it's my son who in kindergarten, was called about three weeks after that he started school.


He stays. The teacher told me that, you know, I've just noticed something it's Friday and all week he's been in charge of the calendar and he has to get up at the beginning of the week. And he has to say the name of the month and the name of the week. And then he has to spell every letter and he's looking at the letters.


And of course he knows his alphabet at this point, but he couldn't recognize by Friday the letters. He couldn't say them out. He knew it was October, but he was like joking and making everybody laugh because he's the life of the party. And he was deflecting an area of struggle in humor and, and all of us can probably think of a way that we deflect things, whether it's through humor or anger or whatever it is, silence, um, empathy being that impact goes into the whole and like, I'm not me.


And so they were encouraging him to get tested for whatever it could be. And he ended up finding out that he had dyslexia. And so we got him enrolled in with a program who every week she would take, teach him and just show him some extra tools that weren't being taught in school. And this was three years ago.


And two years ago he comes home from the same tutor who he had tutored out of. Right. Like she was like, what's the I like, he's doing fine. He can be great. And we're like, Nope, we're going to stick with the program. Like this is working. It's good to go. He went for two years. I'm telling you, David, he hated going.


He hated it. He, it stressed me out. I'm like, do I have to go? I don't want to go. But we, we persistently went. We consistently went and two years ago, and even just in this timeframe, cause he's still going. Um, he's now reading three grade levels above where he was. And they said it wasn't possible. And they said, he'll never get to that place.


And they said that this is just the way that his brain works. And so he'll stay in this struggle his whole life. And I was against what they said in the natural, because I knew that he had the ability to do more. He has now gone from believing that it's possible to, he is a hundred percent convinced that I can read any book that I can read out loud that I can not mix up the letters that I can get the 10 out of 10 on the spelling test.


And that difference in belief that it's possible to convincing, literally changes the trajectory of his life. Yeah. And so it's the taste of the dollar. It's the taste of the word is the taste of the book, right? It's the taste of the thing that you think is impossible that God is going to bounce a flee, provide in your consistence, in your persistence, even kicking and screaming.


Yeah. At some point, there's a sense of surrender that you realize all my prayers are being answered. Yeah. And that's from a mama's heart and also from his, because now he doesn't have to sit in shame when he's in the classroom and he can't read out loud and he doesn't have to deflect it in humor. He gets to stand up confidently and boldly to now bear witness to the kids who are having the hard time.