• Tamra Andress

Faith Breathed Hope with Kristina Risinger

This week I had the pleasure of speaking to Kristina Risinger. Everyone goes through hard times, but when you go through hard times, it is hard to hold it all together, but God gives us the strength to endure. Kristina's grief and loss lead to her beginning a blog to the Faith Breathed Hope podcast.

Key Takeaways

You have the ability to endure

You are not alone

Where the title of her podcast came from

About Kristina:

Kristina Risinger is a daughter of God, wife, mother, and multi-passionate entrepreneur. She is a podcast host at Faith Breathed Hope, grief and emotions coach, author, speaker, summit host, and photographer. She and her husband have six children, one which was called to take her place alongside Jesus in Heaven in 2016.

Their youngest daughter was diagnosed with Trisomy 18 which is considered incompatible with life and passed away shortly before her first birthday. Kristina’s belief that her daughter’s life and death had purpose is what compels her to be a better human being and serve other women through their own adversity. She helps others through the grieving process by placing their faith in God to regain identity and purpose for their lives, and share their stories as they renew hope.

Currently, Kristina is encouraging women in their personal Kingdom walk through her virtual Kingdom Woman Conference Series. She believes that community and fellowship encourage faith, trust, obedience, discipleship, and perseverance.

I remain confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. – Psalm 27:13

Where to Find Kristina:

Show Notes: Faith Breathed Hope with Kristina Risinger

Hi - oh! We are so excited to be here together today to introduce the one and only Kristina Risinger. We are so excited. She has the Faith Breathed Hope Podcast and if you need to know or take anything away from this right now, it is the power of understanding identity and purpose.

Right. And we align in that. She's also a fellow coach specifically around grief and emotions. And so I have a feeling, because I always come to this table open hearted and open minded and just ready for an opportunity of conviction. I know that's a weird way to, like, enter into any setting, but I kind of do it daily because I found that every time I have conviction, I get to become more like Christ. And that's why we're here.

Right? Always becoming and knowing that. So Kristina, I'm so grateful for you. I've I've read your story. I've seen your incredible just deposits into the world. You've had a Kingdom Women's Conference. You're also a photographer, a photographer, which I love, a speaker and an author. And so you can really take the floor and dove into any area that you are most passionate about right now. But we're going to unpack all the pieces of your story.

Thanks for being here.

Thank you so much for having me. I'm really excited. This is something kind of new for me. Even though I do podcasts, I'm excited to see how this works and just be here with you today. So I guess I'll just start off by telling you how I got to where I am right now.

Four years ago, a little over four years ago, my husband and I lost our fourth child. And so I just I'm kind of Type A personality, jump in everything and do everything, and started a blog and worked on actually, I think it's an MLM. It's a health and wellness company. Thinking that I was going to go back to work. I had taught before I had children and took some time off to get my masters or work on my masters and just never went back.

So this kind of pushed me into this place of, hey, I need to cope and I have to be busy or I'm going to be in the bed all the time, not doing anything, feeling sorry for myself. And I don't have that option because I have three small children at home to take care of. So that turned into writing my first book, being certified as a grief coach. And then questions started coming up.

You know, where where am I going with this? What am I doing with this? Am I a traditional coach? Do we do one on ones? Do we do groups? Which I've done and I still do, but I am the square peg in the round hole kind of girl and things I have to do differently than a lot of other people. I just I don't know if it's boredom or just excitement and all the things.

And then this piece to whether I have a Christian business or if I'm just a Christian with a business came up and I noticed that a lot of women, a lot of women are going through this. This thing comes into their mind and they don't know they want to honor God in what they're doing, that maybe they want to serve everybody. You know, they don't want to serve Christians. Yeah.

And so that's how the King of Women Summit series was born. And it was the first that we were going to do just in January was only when we were going to do. And as we continue to pray, it turned into four before that. The only virtual summit I had done was a great symposium, which we do every year. But I was excited to it and we'll just see what God is doing for us.

I love that. I love that. I love these. I don't know if it's like energy or if it's boredom, but you just keep going. And that what you said at the very beginning actually struck home with me is this understanding of I need to get busy or I'm going to be in bed. And and that's what I feel like, a common place for people, especially for me. And and knowing that if I was to have stayed in bed while raising two small children while trying to pursue my marriage, while trying to close out the experience of two businesses, and also to try and find myself in the midst of a lot of pain, I would have well, I wouldn't be here today.

Let's just put it that way. Depression sets in, the anxiety sets in, fear sets in, and the enemy wants that. He wants control in every single area of your weakness. And yet God says, no, no, no. Like, I get to come in and fill those spaces and give you the people and give you the circle and the people and the the heart set in the mindset. And honestly, the identity is always been there.

Right. He's he's warned us before we were in our mother's womb. He is known us and he knows us in this very moment and in every child that we're about to go into. But it can feel hard in bed or busy is a crazy place to be. So as you were activating, as you were getting busy after this loss of your daughter and you actually have. Multiple stories around loss and grief, so do want to unpack what those are, and then I can kind of ask and segue into the transformation of that.

And I would say it's a little better actually hear the question, that's OK, so my question was, no, it's OK.

I see the glitch in tech. We prayed over this before we got on here. We're not going to let the enemy win. And so my question was specifically around understanding that you've actually gone through multiple layers of loss and a lot around your children. And so just wanting to hear a bit about that story and how and then I'll ask you a follow up question to that.


So first of all, you know, when we when we talk about loss and we talk about being able to get out of bed and not allow the opportunity for the enemy to come in, because when we're in bed, what we're doing is we're allowing our minds to just think too much. And that's an opportunity for the devil to come in and just take over and take advantage of our loss, take advantage of our grief.

And so being able to say, hey, I'm going to act opposite and get up and start doing something, it's not necessarily ignoring, and you still have to go through all those emotions and everything that we did have a lot of loss.

I mean, our daughter was in the queue for five and a half months and then we were able to bring her home with nursing care for five months before she passed away. So you have the grief even before the passing. And then after that, you know, we have different things with our other kids.

We have one child. She's our youngest right now, and she loved her finger. And I think we decided it was in October.

And so if anybody doesn't know what that is, she wrapped her finger around CORE Talk and then fell off of the couch. And so what was interesting is that I had just announced that the women group on Facebook, I had just started building it to start talking about the summit and whatever the thing was that the Lord was leading me to.

And I felt like, you know, from the fear, there was a lot of fear from losing her inner child.

And so that doesn't that's one of my struggles. And so it all was welling back up. But then I also felt like there was a place of growth in that where God was saying, you know what, you're building a community of women and.

You are you are strong because he's made me strong, right? He's the only reason that I have that that peace that surpasses all understanding. And I want to say something about that, too. You have to make that choice as a choice. You can choose to stay in the bed. You can choose to, as awful as it sounds, to allow the enemy to creep in. Or you can make that choice to continue to move forward and pursue God and pursue what he has for you and say, you know what, I'm laying this at your feet because I can not handle this.

This is so heavy. And this is not something that. Flesh can bear and I need you, Lord, that I that I go out just a little bit, but I got I got the like yeah, yeah. Your flesh like not wanting. It's OK. It's OK. It's the recognition of that. And like, your flesh is often trying to take over and yet our heart has the desire for more. And so it's that choice. I love that you said that because it ultimately is and and God gives us free will.

Right. And oftentimes we ask ourself, like, why is this happening? And if you go back to the series of choices, of course you can't. You can't. Notate the choice by which your daughter isn't here with you anymore or by the which the the finger that got removed in the midst of you trying to pursue further your kingdom calling. Right. It's a hard thing to process, but there's choices in the midst of it. You can lean into that faith or you could stand and lean into that fear.

And I really felt like the growth aspect in that situation for we had just started the Kingdom Women Group and everything was the God God really laying in on my heart that we need each other and community because where I'm weak, you know, obviously he's strong, but we also depend on one another and have fellowship and we can walk with one another in our journey towards the Lord and serve one another and pray for one another and pray over one another when we can't.

You know, I've certainly been in situations where it's hard to pray, you know, it's hard to go through things.

Yeah, there's definitely been a place where I said, God. I've got nothing. I just I just miss her. That's about all I could say.

I mean, I'm just thinking for my own my own babies, right. And the passion that you have for each child individually and the grief that goes along that and you specifically said it's like a grieving, even though they're still here and then knowing that you're going to be grieving again. I've had several friends, one specifically coming to mind that had to walk through that season. And that grieving process when they're here. Right, is it's hard and it feels wrong.

And you feel. Yeah. You feel like I don't even know how you feel fully because I haven't done it. But I remember walking alongside her and so understanding that in community through your summit, through the pursuit of your huge God dream of like being there in grief coaching. I mean, wow, it's a noble thing to do because I'm sure there is a lot of emotions of trigger that happen in that right.

Mm hmm. And so when you think about the the outcome, the transformation of actually daily choosing that faith over fear, what does that look like? Oh, goodness. So it's it's a lot of are you sure, God, that I'm supposed to be here? This is not the space that I would have ever put myself in. I mean, I was actually getting my master's in addiction counseling, which I a little bit different. And I thought, well, I'm supposed to serve people in this area of emotions and being able to move forward.

And that was one of the things that we said when Isabella was here, when we talk to her doctors, was that we're going to just continue to move forward one step at a time. I think I used the phrase Stairsteps at a time like I'm climbing, you know, because it's very much when we have trials in life, like you're climbing a mountain or something. And so I said, I'm just going to put one foot in front of the other and I'm just going to keep going.

And what I've realized that it's all about perseverance. It's all about trust and obedience and knowing that we go through all of these things in life and it's not just the loss of a child, it's any kind of grief, any kind of loss. But God is there with us and he wants us to trust him. And, you know, it's not always going to be OK. You know, you're going to be sad. You're going to have to feel those emotions that he is going to be there with you and he helps you grow from it.

He helped you when you make the choice to follow him, to grow and to actually serve his kingdom. And I don't know. I'm sure you found that with your podcast, too. It's like when I started my podcast, I just wanted people to know that they weren't alone. And when I continue to do more and more episodes, I figured out that, hey, it helps my guests when they tell their story. And then it also helps me like it wasn't for me.

I didn't think it was for me. But really, it is it's very it's full circle.

I say that often about the book writing process. And I know that you're an author as well, but I am still in the midst of writing my first full book. I've written and authored a coauthored experience book and even just a chapter, even just getting that journaling experience. And you know that journaling is for you and God in that time. But when you know that you're writing something, you're doing it specifically because you're about to share your mess. Right now, you're creating your message for the world to hear and see and break free from the same thing that you might have walked through.

It's like the addiction thing that you brought up. I keep thinking, as you said, that that it's, you know, in programs like AA, right. Alcohol's an Alcoholics Anonymous, that you have to choose the coin every single day. And you just wake up and you say, today, I'm not going to drink, and today I'm going to choose faith and today I'm going to find joy. Right. And so knowing that it really is that stair stepper experience where it's just day by day sometimes and honestly, entrepreneurism is day by day like people, things like glitz and glamor on camera all the time.

And you put your lips on. Right. And it's like the recognition that there's a lot of stuff that goes on behind the scenes like technologies. If you saw my desk right now, it's like cords everywhere.

And it's just the recognition that, like, everything isn't shiny. Everything about these beautiful family photos that you have on your website, these beautiful photos that you have about life after losing a loved one, which we're going to dove into. There's a story behind that. And when we come to the table, inhumanity and openness. It allows other people to say yes to the stare.

Yes. And, you know, I think that there is a balance to between saying, you know what, I'm a really professional because that was me.

Like, I have to come to the table even with the grief coach.

How can I serve other people when I'm still crying because I miss my child will probably forever cry over her. And it's not even a day to day thing. It's sometimes a moment to moment thing.

And that thing that I cry every single day, you know, but it's something that we have a lifetime to live with and it gets better and you learn from it. And for instance, with me, I'm now able to see her life as a gift rather than something that had been stolen. But, you know, like you said with the entrepreneur, you come in and you think that you're supposed to be a certain way, is it? I'm supposed to present myself as being the authority on everything or am I supposed to just, you know, word vomit, everything that's going on in my life.

And for me personally, I think we're some kind of a balance. You know, many people have told me we've got little kids because we started homeschooling this year and oh, it's just natural.

Everybody everybody needs to know that you're human, that I really struggled with that, you know, likewise, I didn't continue it.

But when it happened and I had to who it was a lot to juggle. It's a lot to juggle. And I think that's the most important thing for us to realize. Like people have one perspective, whether that's your highlight reel. I don't encourage highlight reels. I encourage you to be vulnerable and chance. In those places, but it's OK if that's the choice that you make, if professionalism is the air that you need to hold, like if I was a lawyer or a judge, I couldn't go out and put, like, every single component of my life in that regard for my clients to receive.

They'd be like, oh, she's going through a divorce, but she's a divorce attorney. That's interesting.

And it happens. It does happen.

And that's where Grace comes into play. But that's a whole nother conversation. It's the realization that you might only see one piece of the puzzle, but there's a lot of other pieces to the puzzle that we on a daily basis are maneuvering. And whether that's something in secret, something like grief, something where you're in the shadows still and it's still a lie and you've yet to air it to even God himself who already sees it, by the way. But you're holding out is is this knowing that these areas like entrepreneurship where imposter syndrome can set in and you're like, I am still grieving and yet I am a grief coach while I am still building my business and I am a business coach, you're always in that state of becoming.

We're always in that state. And this morning on our clubhouse rise and grind breakfast of champions, we were talking all about evolution. Right? And so we are always in evolution. And when you're stopping when you're stopping that evolution process, you're inhibiting your purpose because God wants us to become more like him, just like we said at the very beginning. So I'm curious, as you stepped in to be like being an author and writing about it, like what was the angle that you took with your book specifically through everything that you went through?

When I started actually blogging and I started the blog, well, when I started blogging, I didn't realize that it was a coping strategy and it was natural for me. I thought that I was talking to other moms saying, hey, you're going to be OK, I'm going to be your cheerleader, even though I just lost my own daughter. I'm going to cheer you on. And same thing with the book. I knew I had wanted to write a book and I actually ended up hiring a coach.

And when I hired the coach, we talked about what to write about. I didn't go into it saying, oh, I'm going to write about losing my daughter or after losing a loved one, you know, I went in thinking even I might write a cheese cake cookbook. I didn't know. I just wanted to write.

Well, what happened was that I ended up writing Life after losing a loved one.

And, you know, I go through different stages of grief. But even now, four years or a couple of years later, I realized that it's not it's not going to ever be the same for anybody. You know, you may go through one stage and you may skip the stage and we go back to the stage. And so but the angle for that was to show people that there again, they're not a lot you can find hope. You can be strong.

You know, you can you can be able to walk forward and have purpose after big events happen in your life. You don't have to find yourself in this place where you're paralyzed.

And it was just really to encourage other people, because what happened was I went on like Facebook and things like that, and I was finally able to allow myself to look at some of these groups that I was not able to do emotionally this here.

And everybody was sad. It just made me cry because I would just continuously read these stories and I noticed I was getting depressed and I wanted to, like, hug these people and tell them, hey, you know what? You don't have to be here the rest of your life.

God wants you to be to have goodness. I mean, to experience his goodness, to have joy. He doesn't want you to, like, just start doing cartwheels after you have to laugh at him. But he wants to open his arms and wrap around you and comfort you. And there were so many people out there, they didn't they didn't believe this. They I don't know if they don't know it or they just they don't believe it. They feel like.

There's no moving forward that they would rather not be here, that kind of thing, and it's a very real thing, the first time you ever laugh, the first time you ever cry when somebody dies. And it's just it's very difficult to hear that completely.

And you said something that resonated a lot with me, which is it's not ever going to be the same. And it's this recognition that there again comes choices. Right. If you're recognizing that your life is living in a cyclical zone, if you are on the same cycle and the same trauma or the same trigger or the same trial are coming in your way as a roadblock, there's a choice and there are ways to inhibit that same placement. Now, the grief might always be there, but day by day, you are replenished, you are renewed.

You are given that comfort from our comforter to say you can keep going. He'll give you a new dream. He'll give you a new passion. He'll bring life or a memory in such a beautiful way that you can grasp hold of that on that day. And so there's many like Christian songs that say like it's never going to be the same. It'll never be the same. Now that I know you, God, my life will never be the same.

And that was when all the cycles, all the patterns, all the coping mechanisms of my life were finally set to the side. Now, to say that I'm in my state of perfection by no means coping mechanisms talk about bed to busy like I'm a like you're so busy.

I'm like, I'm so intentional.

I like preach that over my life because I'm I don't want to be a person of busy to suppress anything else. I want to be a person who is present to receive everything else. Right. But there's cycles and there's reasons that we go through these cycles and through therapy, which I'm sure you coach and train, is this ability to remove yourself from the cycle, to look back on the cycle as an expression of who you used to be, but not who you are on the state you used to exist in, on the bed that you used to stay in, but not the bed that you need to be in today.

Just. And it's it's a lot about, you know, you hear a lot of this stuff about mindset right now and, you know, I think the the scripture ultimately shares that whole idea about our mindset, where we place our thoughts and our values and our beliefs. That's that's how we're going to act. And when you look back on whatever's happened in your life and you're able to identify all of the emotions and then you're able to capture the thoughts and know whether it's truth or lies, you know, and then you're able to try to break everything down that way and you can move forward and, you know, God is there to help you and strengthen you.

And, of course, our scripture backs all of that up forever.

Everything that stop scrounging, go get the Bible.

Yes. And, you know, there's hope. I mean, in a sense that God is our stronghold.

You know, he is. And, you know, that was my my peace to the king. The women event in January is that we think of strongholds as things that hold us down you, things that might allow us to be free. But the scripture tells us that God is our stronghold, he is our protector, and he is the one that even though we go through all these things on life, he's our hope. And when we go to him and we lay everything at his feet, then he provides a way.

I think that's so good.

And I, as you were saying, that had the imagery of an anchor. Right. And we know that he is our anchor. And no matter like it is already said also in scripture that there will be trials and tribulations, meaning the waves are going to continue to knock you down. Friend, it's never said he died. Right. There might be moments where it's a less windy day and you're like, I can enjoy this moment. Let me catch my breath, but be prepared.

Stay anchored in who he is and you will not go astray. You will not drift. You will not have that issue. Doesn't mean you're not going to drown sometimes. But he's already there. He's already called you above the water. But the problem is, as we stay in this place where we think, OK, I got to stay busy, I got to keep going towards this person, this purpose, I got to keep going towards this prize, or is this goal when ultimately that resting zone that you were talking about, that coming into the arms to be comforted by the father on the days that it's just really hard, you get to slow down your piece of the pie to today is rest your piece of the pie today is being right and knowing that he is there in the midst.

And the thing that you think you have to do that you're freaking out that you want to control so badly like this is how it needs to end. And if I don't do it, if I don't show up for this thing, it'll all crumble. But guess what? He's the maker of all things. He's the maker of every component of your being, every opportunity, every asset, every liability. Even he will come in as the stronghold to sustain you.

And so it's a matter of flipping the Lindsey choice that I had to change the episode here. This is not Faith Brazo. This is Faith Breathed Hope Podcast by choice. Looks like, right. We get to choose. The breath is given, the breath is already given, because he chose to give us life, but the faith in the hope that's on us.

So talk us through from like an experience of emotion and grief coaching for your virtual summits, which are now doing, are you doing them quarterly, like consistently? Is that what you've committed to this year? We are.

We are doing for this year. Our next one is coming up in April. And then we have one in July and one in November. Amazing.

So tell us, like what? What are the themes? Do they change? How can people get involved in that?

Yeah. So the one in January was called planting seeds. The one that we're coming up to in April is called bearing fruit.

And July is going to be a workshop type type summit that is called Reflecting Light. And then in November, we have a daughter of the king, which is Proverbs 30, one woman, because most of it is I mean, it's just about the woman who is a Christian woman who wants to just honor God in all aspects of her life.

I love that so much. And so, I mean, we have a website, Kingdome Women Dot Net, and people can reach out through their thinking, you know, attend the summit and they can be speakers. Absolutely.

Hey, look at that. They're looking for speakers. Yeah. We've got lots of people in our community who love to speak and share and share actually components of your testimony. I've had a couple other people on the podcast that I'll have to send you the links to afterwards to share and just commune further and in the connectivity. Right. Like he gives us people who have already either paved the way or have walked alongside you or stewarding it just the way that you know how or a little bit differently, which gives you another tool to your tool belt.

And so the recognition that even though we choose, even though Kristina and I show up, doesn't mean that it doesn't hurt, doesn't mean that we don't cry, doesn't mean that we don't get overwhelmed. Doesn't mean that busy doesn't plague us instead of intentionality. Doesn't mean that sometimes I want to stay in bed. But but we got one shot as our last podcast guest was talking all about that yesterday. We get one shot, y'all.

I just want you guys to take note of that. Even in the midst of loss, there's a reason you're still there. So what's what's the rise at that point?

How how do you encourage people through your counseling to to dust off those knees, dry their eyes a bit? What do you say? Well, the first thing is, you know, they have to know what they're going through. Sometimes we go through things and we feel and we experience emotions that we cannot identify. We don't know that we're fussing at everybody because we're grieving. You know, we don't know that we're angry because we're sad, you know.

And so just being able to know those emotions, identify them and work through them is huge, you know, and knowing that once you're going through those emotions, knowing that what you are allowing yourself to feel, it's not as scary because you you're kind of going through it.

And also, like I said before, knowing God is always going to be there. Sometimes we look at things and we say, where are you? I don't see you, you know, and I'm I'm guilty of that. And like, God, I'm praying and I'm asking and I'm thinking and I'm trying my best, but I am just feeling distraught and weary right now. Can you please reveal yourself to me? Because I'm struggling.

And as you said a little bit before, God already knows our thoughts anyways. Right? So why are we holding things back? Why are we afraid to go to him? He knows everything that's in our minds anyway, right?

It's like speaking them out loud makes them more real. But they're already real whether you speak them out or not, because he knows. Right. And you said what specific word is like the understanding of breath. Right. And like breathing through it. And I just had some amazing women into New Mexico with me on a retreat. And it was the first time I ever did like coaching on breath work and the ability to be able to actually center yourself.

And we look for God. And he's right in our breath. He it's the breather of life. That's how man and woman were established in the first place, all the way back to Genesis. Right. So if you're looking for him, maybe instead you just need to breathe his air that he's gifted you again for today. And it's taking that mental space and that mental time out to just rest in that breath. Thank you, God, for this for this day, for this moment, right, even in the midst of my pain, I'm still breathing.

And what's interesting is when I first came up with that with the blog, it was like life, life with hope or something like that. I was not Faith Breathed Hope Podcast, but it was it was because I felt like I couldn't breathe. The sadness was so overwhelming and I needed him to just help me breathe.

And we take that for granted. Oh, good. Yeah.

You know, and then I found the word Ruark, which means spirit of God, Spirit, breath. And I thought, this is perfect because that's what we need is the Holy Spirit to bring them to us so that we know what to do. We know how to live. We know that there's hope and feel like it's the winds, you know. And you know, I'll tell you a quick story.

I go for runs trying to build back up my endurance. And I started this year raising my hands on my right arm just in praise. And I thought when I first started doing it, I kind of had this inner dialog with God and I was like, God, I don't want to do this. I look stupid. These people are going to think I'm an idiot.

I'm like, what's going on here with my hands up and running?

And they're going to think I'm in distress, that I need some help, that somebody is chasing me or somebody. And I'm like, no, just do it. And then what happened is that I would feel the wind blow. And I was like, oh, yes, God is moving.

And so I had. I got you, I got you. Yeah, which is a space of obedience, you know, that's so good. What if nothing else?

You're worshiping me, you're praising me. And if nothing else, this is to prove to you, not necessarily to everybody else, to you that you can be obedient and I'm going to be faithful.

I love that so much. And I'm just becoming a running lover. So I will say that I love to run.

I used to lie and make my own dad in the idea that I hated running, but I've always wanted to run. I'm in a family of runners. I watched my parents run marathons, half marathons, get medals clapped, always on the sideline. I love to see the emotion that goes into a run, specifically a long distance run. But any run I never ever until literally a couple of days ago unlocked runner's high or what that even meant. And so, as you're saying that and you just got your hands in the air, I remember in the middle of that run, just like raising my hands and I was chanting and cheering for my son to keep going.

Here I am running and he's on a bike. But he thought he was gonna get frostbite. So heaven forbid it's 50 degrees outside.

And so I remember having that moment and I was like, wow, I feel free right now. But I also remember the emotion I had gone running at the beach, which I love. Beach runs barefoot and any time of year, but specifically in the summer. And it was like springtime. So there was nobody on the beach at this point. And I was running and there was like, you know, people walking their dogs. Right. Nobody was like sitting out, wasn't warm enough for that.

And I had the overwhelming sensation to dance. Like, I just feel I just want to dance. And I used to be in gymnastics. So ballet was always a component of that. I did jazz and school and things like that. And so I was like, you know what? I could worry myself with what everybody else thought of me. Or I could just obediently, like you said, this overwhelming energy, this overwhelming praise had just been flipped upside down.

And I was in a state of like, just thank you. Gratitude, right. That gratitude piece. Gratitude for my breath, gratitude for the day, gratitude for the ocean, gratitude for the wind. I didn't have to be grateful for the situation. I didn't have to be grateful for the thing that I was, like, struggling with still.

I didn't even have to be grateful for the choices I had made, but I could be grateful for his presence. So I stood there dancing on the side of the ocean. And lo and behold, I thought I saw dolphins and I was so excited and I got my camera out and like, oh, my God, you guys.

And a humpback whale jumped, breached the ocean.

He fell back and I was screaming. I'm like, oh, my gosh, I'm crying. And to, like, show off for me, Jesus.

It's the understanding that in those acts of obedience, the ones that we do when they feel the most hard, that God will show up in the biggest way because he wants to affirm his children. He wants us to know that we are loved. He wants us to feel that wind and that comfort. And yet, if we never say yes to the thing that our spirit hit him within us is saying to do, we never get to experience that freedom factor.

Right. So it was such a beautiful thing, and as you were saying that I knew I needed to share because it was the only thing that was kept from running replay in my mind. Yeah, that such a sight for me as a photographer, I would love to see that. Oh yeah, I've got the video. I couldn't even take pictures because I was just like, oh, my gosh. But I caught the whole thing. I caught the whole thing.

And since then, I've got to go and show my kids humpback whales in Mexico. And they're beautiful creatures. I think. I love water. I love I love the ever flowing movement of water that change. Just watching something that's always changing. Right. We're so intrigued by watching the process of a caterpillar. Right. That turn into butterflies. And my kids are in kindergarten first grade into the first and second grade class at their school. They do this and they put them in to their little cages and they watch the process and they're so enamored.

But the most exciting part is watching them fly. Right. The most exciting part is watching the final transformation, the flight. And so you as a coach, get to partner with people through the grief, through the hard stuff. But talk to us about that that emotion or that time or an example of when somebody took flight, what happened next after they were with you. What's the transformation like in that experience? Well, it's it's the transformation between this is a thought process, it's a it's a mindset almost and I hate to use that because it's overly used, but it's this idea of I can't buy into this idea of I can and will be OK thinking that my mind can go there.

You know, I can't allow that emotion to seep in. It would be too painful. I can't embrace it to this place where you take steps, small steps. You know, it depends on the person that you take the small steps to walk through that and to feel it and to let it sink in and to try to process what it is that you feel and think about it and to say, OK, I'm kind of sitting in it and it's not killing me, you know, and then moving a little bit further and pass.

So it's almost like I think about maybe like a mud puddle or something. You know, you don't want to cross it, but then you go a little bit in a little bit and you're finally on the other side. Right.

And while you're in the in the middle of the puddle, you have to make sure that you know what is from the enemy, because, again, he's going to take that opportunity to, like, hassle you and say, hey, you know what, this is not right. You can't do this. No, no, no. And and the thing is, is you can't because God is saying, yes, yes, you can hold my hand.

I'm going to get you a cross and you have to be willing to reach out your hand. And there's a great like a caricature or a cartoon. It's probably like when they call names, I guess. Yeah. Yeah.

Where Jesus is kind of kneeling with a little child in the child has this little I think it's a little teddy bear or something that it's holding on tight to. Have you seen it?

I have. I love it so much. Yeah.

This has this great big line behind his back is like just just trust me. Reach out, reach out your hands. Mean trust me, I have something far better for you.

That's such a good analogy. I love it.

I think I think it's great that it's so hard for people to grasp that you have to take that initial step.

And I think one of the things, too, is this recognition that we often take ownership or we allow ourselves almost a pass because we say, well, the enemy is doing this or the enemy has control over this thing. But I threw my season of hardship and walking through things that, like I said, were partially my choice. Right. I made a choice to choose these coping mechanisms. I made a choice to choose to do these things outside of my marriage, to not stand within the motherhood that I wanted to be, to not be the daughter or the friend or any of these things.

Right. And their choices. And at the exact same time, I easily at first, because I think this might be a Christian thing to do, to say it was the enemy. But Tamra, in my flesh, human flesh chose these imperfect choices that didn't add to my character. And maybe the enemy was at play at the rooted part of that experience at the first play when I didn't have control, when I was three years old. Right.

When I was five years old and seven years old and thirteen years old and seventeen years old. Right. All these pivotal moments of pain in my life. Maybe the enemy was there, but every choice thereafter, it was because of that deposit that I told myself I played the own mental battle of I can't or I shouldn't or I won't or I'm not worthy or I'm not beautiful or I'm not capable.

Right. All of these common threads that you hear people speak over their lives or owning, I am depressed. Are you or do you feel emotions that are connected to depression? Because you are a daughter, you are a son, you are called and worthy and noble, and those things are just blanket statements towards an action that you're choosing to do. A choice that you're going to stay in bed. Further deteriorates your body, further deteriorate your spiritual being, further deteriorate your mental well-being.

And therefore, you own depression or a physical ailment or an emotional like any of these things, right. But yet if you get up, if you think God for the breath in your lungs, if you recognize that today is an opportunity that he's already gifted your life and what are you going to do with it? And don't let anything get in your way. He will he will try, especially when you take ownership over these thoughts like I'm telling you to do right now.

But what if instead of blaming, take ownership, you change them, you change the habits, you change the bad belief system. And you show up with your arms raise and you say, God, thank you.

Even in spite of I praise you, even if everybody thinks I'm crazy, I'm going to do this wild thing and I'm going to stay close enough to you that you are the whisperer here instead of the enemy.

It's a choice. Yes, right. So I am I'm honored to spend this time with you, I want to hear if there's any, like LARC, just overwhelming sensations of thought to share. And also, where can people be guided to be closer to you? I know you mentioned Kingdom Women ET. Please check that out. It is an incredible resource and I love the imagery and color palette, by the way, and hopefully I'll be speaking in the business sector, so we'll talk about that later.

But tell me, what's that last that last nugget? If someone was only listen to the end, if they would only read the conclusion.

OK. All right. No pressure right now. Go. No. So the encouragement that I would give people is that to to know that we we have trials, know that you have a choice to seek out your heavenly father, know that he wants your goodness. You know, he wants to give you his gifts, his goodness in the land of the living, not just in heaven. Heaven is perfect also to tell you that stewardship. OK, you mentioned stewardship a little bit earlier.

I do believe that something that I've noticed in my own life is that when you make that choice to pursue the kingdom, he gives you a little nugget, some things, and it's up to you to make good of what he's given. And the more and more you prove that you're going to make good of what he has given you, you're a good steward. He will give you more. He will open the doors for you.

And it might not always look the way that you wanted it to, but that's OK, because you know that he knows better than anybody. And on the other hand, you also mentioned is gratitude.

And it's very difficult to look at a space of hurt in our space of pain and say, how in the world can I have gratitude? I have lost X, Y and Z and I am in this terrible place. But I promise you that if you can find one small thing to be thankful for and you start thinking about that thing and how it enhances your life, then it will lead to another thing and then another thing and it will just lull.

And before you know it, you will begin to have hope in your heart will swell. It's kind of like the Grinch. His heart was two sizes too small, I guess just that ability to have our hearts swell once we we have this this whole area of gratitude and praise in our life, you know, just praising makes your heart swell with love and peace. And just this idea in this area of, hey, I'm going to be OK.

I can hope I can lean on the Lord, I can be obedient.

I can be a good steward. Every little thing that he gives me, even if it's very little.

And as far as finding me, I'm on the Internet, but also I have Kristina Risinger dotcom and that is where I have stuff about the coaching and then my books and well, I'm going to have another book I'm writing and I believe it's going to be a little bit of a process.

I'm excited. I already have an illustrator and a website that you mentioned.

Our website designer is just amazing. Her name is Ruby Vanilla. And so I want to thank her right now.

Just I can't take credit for the way she's a great job so that I really thank you for allowing me to be here.

I'm on Facebook. We have a women group on Facebook that we would love for you to join. And Instagram, kind of like most of the places. Not all the places. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Okay, that's amazing. Thank you.

Well, we are doing for those that are listening live today and we'll listen in the next couple of days. I'm actually partnering with somebody who does the rise and grind show. His name is Glen Lundie and it's for a flash mob. It's a kingdom flash mob that's going to be taking place on reels and tip top. And we're dropping it on Friday at 10:00 a.m. So if anybody is listening and they want to get outside of their comfort zone, if they want to praise Jesus, if they want to give him the glory, if they want to spread positivity, positivity, they have an opportunity to do so at rise and grind mob dot com.

And if you're listening to the podcast version and not the live version, then it's over. But go check out the hashtag rise and grind and see all of the silly dancing, all of the blooper reels and all of the goodness that's going to be spreading to the world. Kristina, as you were talking, I was thinking about that word balance, which for the people of my community know that kind of makes me cringe inside because I don't really believe in balance.

I believe more in this vertical alignment versus versus horizontal deposit. But as you were speaking, that that nugget actually got put back into my mind. And I was imagining you and I on like a scale. Right. And I had mentioned being a lawyer. And you have that scale where they're like Evan, Evan flowing. Right. And I'm a ball of energy. I could literally do jumping jacks right now. I'm so excited to just, like, be here and like receive the.

The energy that you have, which is very juxtaposing to mine and it's so good that like God creates his children so differently to represent different sides of his character, to show up and showcase and just comfort people, I can activate you. But Kristina, there is an air of just comfort in who you are. And I know part of that is because of the pain you walk through. So just to give you gratitude in this moment for saying yes, for getting out of bed and for showing up in your breath today to to pour into my community, but also to pour into yours.

And so we honor you. Thank you so much. Thank you so much. You're welcome.

All right, guys, we'll see you soon.

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